I used to work in a hardware store in a well to do area. We would get middle age ladies coming into the store asking for help with simple items. They got the house in the divorce but didn’t know how to do anything. They were finding out that a handyman will charge $100 just to show up. So, “Yes, I can show you how to change a toilet flapper.”
Totally ripped this one off from some comic somewhere:
My wife complained/whined: “We never go out anymore. I want you to take me out. I don’t care where, as long as its expensive”….So, i took her to the airport for a sandwich. (ta-da-dump!)
A friend from high school was telling us how she landed her husband. She was a loan officer in the bank, and in walks this nice looking man applying for a home loan. He asked her out, and in her words, “After looking over his divorce decree, loan application, and credit report, I said yes.” AFAIK they are still together.
John Lustig (Last Kiss) creator over 1 year ago
Here’s the link to the original vintage art and text.
http://www.lastkisscomics.com/comic/love-you-can-bank-on/
Copy and paste or highlight the link and right click to go to the page. Thanks!
C over 1 year ago
Will need your real body count first
sevaar777 over 1 year ago
The real reason many get married. Sorry, the myth of “the one” is just that.. a myth.
Say What Now‽ Premium Member over 1 year ago
Let’s just say, with my bank account I can treat you quite well. Do you prefer Burger King or McDonalds?
PraiseofFolly over 1 year ago
“It worries me you behave so cryptically about your finances.”
The Reader Premium Member over 1 year ago
The wife got it in the divorce.
Me_ over 1 year ago
The amount in my bank account has few zeros in it. Mostly at the beginning.
nosirrom over 1 year ago
On shore or off shore?
scote1379 Premium Member over 1 year ago
She got the Gold Mine , I got the Shaft !
Dobby53 Premium Member over 1 year ago
“In for a penny, in for a Pound” (We’ll move to London and off-shore all the accounts).
Vet Premium Member over 1 year ago
Let me sleep on it….I’ll give you an answer in the morning.
Bruce1253 over 1 year ago
I used to work in a hardware store in a well to do area. We would get middle age ladies coming into the store asking for help with simple items. They got the house in the divorce but didn’t know how to do anything. They were finding out that a handyman will charge $100 just to show up. So, “Yes, I can show you how to change a toilet flapper.”
Zebrastripes over 1 year ago
Well she sure isn’t shy about what’s she’s after…OY!
Another Take over 1 year ago
“NO – NOT YOUR PASSBOOK ACCOUNT! THE SWISS AND CAYMAN ISLAND ACCOUNTS, YA DOLT!”
swanridge over 1 year ago
And what’s your blood type? You have two healthy kidneys, right?
Calvins Brother over 1 year ago
It looks like a Binary number, mostly zeros.
MuddyUSA Premium Member over 1 year ago
And oh, what is that bulge there?
mokspr Premium Member over 1 year ago
Well first off, it’s in my mother’s name…
David Huie Green AmericaIsGreatItHasUs over 1 year ago
“Onshore or offshore?”
“Never mind, just give me the account information. I have a spending spree in mind.”
bmckee over 1 year ago
And depending on the number, ending with your bank account. Unless you have a large portfoliio of investments.
Boffo Premium Member over 1 year ago
Getting a Lois Lane vibe here.
nednewbie over 1 year ago
I think I’m going to steal that come-one :-D
goblue86 over 1 year ago
Totally ripped this one off from some comic somewhere:
My wife complained/whined: “We never go out anymore. I want you to take me out. I don’t care where, as long as its expensive”….So, i took her to the airport for a sandwich. (ta-da-dump!)
goblue86 over 1 year ago
A friend from high school was telling us how she landed her husband. She was a loan officer in the bank, and in walks this nice looking man applying for a home loan. He asked her out, and in her words, “After looking over his divorce decree, loan application, and credit report, I said yes.” AFAIK they are still together.