Close to Home by John McPherson for October 25, 2023

Gear “R” is!

I’m sure they have hearing aids too and at reasonable prices….A BUCK AN EAR! ;D

“Pay”?? You’re not paying attention sir.

Yo ho, and half a bottle of rum.

Genius. Find an unmet market and fill it.

Got any parrots for the shoulder?

The place down the street also sells individual ears in case you lost one in a pirate raid. And they are cheap. (Wait for it) Only a buck an ear.

It makes sense if you only have one eye. It could also make sense if you only have one ear – especially when you only have to pay a bucc-an-eer.

So… I wonder what they can do with pirate booty?

Hey! Not THAT booty… the pillage and plunder booty! I knew that’d be the first place you guys would go!

Another name for it could be Pirates’ Paradise.

And they don’t sell Pairrots, either.

Do they have a half off discount?

Just like his leg. Buy one and get the other half off

And don’t forget the Michael Jackson line of gloves!

I have a supply of left handed coffee mugs – only 10% more than conventional ones.

That guy must be a hoot in yoga class.

Hi, Bleeb. It’s good to see you, little alien dude.

It would appear that pirating is fairly hazardous duty. Their work comp premiums must be murder.

Do you parrots, treasure chests and rum? OH MY!

Well, as I only really have one bad eye, I have been casually looking for a monocle for a while now. Maybe it’s time to pull the trigger on the “Klink” look.

But what if you are a Marlin’s fan?

Pirates R Us!

And the latest iPatch just came in.

Losing appendages and vision has got to be the funniest thing about being a pirate. :(

Where do you keep the half jock straps?

Good deal! That would explain the half off sign!

Monocle, anyone?

He’s only half the man ge used to be.

Can you buy in bulk and save money?

You can also buy music in mono instead of stereo, for play on a single headphone channel. Unfortunately, all the music’s pirated.

But do you have Buy One, Get One Free?

And, We sharpen dull hooks!