Brewster Rockit by Tim Rickard for July 30, 2024

Why did the chicken do the fifty yard dash?

To avoid the debate.

Can we enter the crooks in the shooting events?

This out to be a good story arc

How many people crossing the border can you say “Don’t” to in one minute? How many countries can you deter from attacking/invading by just telling them “Don’t”? How many shoplifters can you stop by just telling them “No.”?

There’s a funny video out there of the “average” games. The funniest is a bunch of overweight guys racing around a track pulling two garbage cans

On the heels of Traveler’s comment, try googling, John Belushi, and “little chocolate donuts.“ I would try to add the link, but as we know, GC has become a pain in the keister about that.

I just looked it up, and it is 45 years old. I but, it cannot be. I am still only 25.

“How many lies can you tell in one minute? Go!”

“GOLD! to Old and Weird!” {"Hey, he broke our Tabulator!"}

I like it!

The problem is, whoever “wins” this race is the one we don’t want in office…

Every candidate (Dem/Rep) has the same answer “Add to it”

In 1976, I was national co-chairman of a campaign which ran a man with a bag over his head for President. In the Everyman tradition, it was a different person under the bag every time. We had one person who really wanted to do it but was too shy to speak in public. I wrote a series of political questions and he pre-recorded answers on a cassette tape.

At the event, we had “plant” reporters in the crowd to ask the questions – in random order. The candidate just held up his tape recorder and played the next answer, whatever that happened to be.

It was SO MUCH like a real press conference we couldn’t believe it. :)

We already know what they’re going to do about the debt.

They’re going to make it even debt-ier.

I’m trying to imagine what Olympic event these candidates could compete in. Let’s see, break dancing? As if! Ah yes, fencing, that’s a lot like campaigning.

The election ALWAYS takes place in an Olympic year. (We just won’t mention that the 2020 Olympics actually took place in 2021…)

Except for the pandemic years, the Summer Olympics ALWAYS coincide with the US Election Conventions.

In that case, Simone Biles for president.

Trump won that at the NABJ interview when they started asking about Project 2025. It’s the only way he can win.