Drabble by Kevin Fagan for January 26, 2025

You have to vet for this stuff before marriage, Ralph

I’m like that with parking spaces.

It’s usually my husband who will change tables when he either feels a draft or if there’s a heater just above the table.

We sit where they put us but once in a while we have gotten up to change tables if they put people with a squalling kid near us.

The only time I ever asked to change tables was when I was seated next to Jake and Elwood Blues

This is my wife. She chooses a table as if it’s going to be her final resting place.

Where is Norm

It looks like he’s resting his belly on the table…

And then they wonder why it takes so long to get waited on !

Hope they don’t sit in the closed section, where no waitress is assigned !

He’s waiting for you to find your final resting place.

He’s getting the whole thing on video

I went on a picnic with my wife and her cousin. I told cousin’s husband, when we got through the gates, “Let’s just put te stuff down here; they’ll change their minds a few times before they decide.”

I can’t wait for a day with Norm to post this.

I once was almost home from a job, an all-nighter, and was dead tired. I got to a four-way stop sign about 9 blocks from my house. I waited a long time for that stop sign to turn green. Didn’t happen.

Is Ralph on his phone the whole time because he knows it’s going to be a long process? I don’t see Ralph as one of those people attached to their phones.

I like my back to the wall facing out and I take note of how the tables are organized – in a circle, side by side or row by row then I check out where the fire exits are. Paranoid? You bet lol the corner by the fire exit is my favorite. Put the phone down Ralph, is that the ball game?

Reminds me of my late in-laws. My wife taught me to wait until they sat down in a restaurant before taking my own seat, because they were likely to reject the hostess’ choice of a table two or three times before settling on one they deemed satisfactory.

But we all have our little quirks, and that was one of theirs. I miss them.

I prefer a table with chairs to a booth even though in most restaurants (and many other places) my feet don’t reach the floor when I sit down and it is hard to pull the chair in.

So why don’t I prefer a booth where this would not be a problem? Well, we had bed bugs a few years ago (and the process to get rid of them is not only EXPENSIVE, but also EXHAUSTING to get the house ready for same – and it took over 10 years for the bite marks to even start disappearing my arms) and they are more likely to be in a bench unless it is hard surface than in a chair – and I never want them to visit again!! (Same is why we only travel in our tiny RV as we will NOT stay in a hotel/motel again.)

We tend to eat in two or three local restaurants and we know which tables we like. The Wendys we normally go to (for some reason husband has a fascination with eating lunch at Wendys – I have him down to only 3 visits a week) has recently undergone a changeover to their newest decor. (There was at least one other decor between what they had before and this one – which I will say is better than the one between, but still a “what the heck where they thinking” decor.) So we went several times before he decided where he wanted to sit. Of course most times the place is empty, but someone is either sitting there or one of the two tables on either side of it and we don’t feel comfortable sitting that close to someone yet (after Covid) – but I have found an alternative table in either direction as needed. Really don’t understand who came up with this design/layout – only (2) booths for groups of 4 – no tables for 4. 2 different tables for 8 people – rare we see a crowd that big looking to sit together if at all? One of them a tall table that I could not even climb up onto the chairs if I had to. Three tall bar-height small round tables with stools. Rest is for twos. And most of the tables rock and back and forth as levelers on feet of the tables are not set evenly.