Kliban by B. Kliban for February 10, 2025

I feel light-headed.

Changing your mind.

He was diagnosed as a dim bulb, short a few watts.

The floor is something we must fight against.

Whilst seemingly mere platform for the human

stance, it is that place that men fall to.

I am not dizzy. I stand as a tower, a lighthouse;

the pale ray of my sentiency flowing from my face.

.

But should I go dizzy I crash down into the floor;

my face into the floor, my attention bleeding into

the cracks of the floor.

.

Dear horizontal place, I do not wish to be a rug.

Do not pull at the difficult head, this teetering

bulb of dread and dream . . .

.

— Russell Edson, “The Floor”

“I didn’t hear you, doc. Watt did you say?”

Finally! The answer to “how many doctors does it take to screw in a lightbulb?”

I’m glad to see he’s finally getting his head screwed on properly.

Head transplant?

It’s annoying when you tighten the new head all the way, and it isn’t quite aligned properly, even if you replaced it with the exact same model. And don’t get me started on these new LED heads.

He went from being a dim bulb to a bright light.

Upgrading, says Dr. Watt, is elementary for my dear Watt son.

Well I always thought he had a good head on his shoulders but Whodathunk he was the screw-in type?