Close to Home by John McPherson for January 27, 2025

Jack Shlerg was a rule breaker.

He died in sheer agony.

And Bleeb is in camouflage again today.

I was gonna say that his mom probably put that on his headstone, but then I thought naaaaaaah… she woulda added: “after his mama told him not to”…

Looking at the dates, people die young around there.

This always a good strip for cool comments. I’ll take a stab at it.

Take a trip, have a nice fall!

Turner Hall combo?

It’s safer to run with paper or a rock than with scissors,

I knew Jack Shlerg in high school, he was a real cut up!

I see names from both sides of my family!!!

And behind is the man who played with lawn darts.

Bleeb is looking a little green . . . I hope he’s not sick! ;)

Scissors was a street gang, many who ran with them ended up here.

It was bound to happen sometime.

The repentant candidate:

“I’d rather go running with the devil than run with SCISSORS in the next election.”

So… HE was the one. I wonder if it was as fun as they say.

Myers—you know, the guy with the dented head—drowned in Nicaragua when he jumped off a boat to chase a dolphin.

You could shoot your eye out….Wait that’s a different thing.

Headstone Not Shown – “He ran with bagpipes and got kilt.” (rim shot – Really folks, I’ll be here all week and don’t forget to take care of your wait staff)

Simms died at his desk. It took three days for anyone to notice.

I had a dog named Jack Sparrow, and another named William Turner, and a friend named Vera Nyberg.

Would have been great if the name was “Frasier Crane” – “Ran With Scissors”

He died doing what he loved: being a real cut-up.

Remember: handle first

one of the farside comics was two guys jogging… one was a real guy, the other was a big pair of scissors, and the guy says to the scissors something like “my mom says I can’t run with you anymore”…..

He didn’t die from it, it was just a lifestyle choice that became a party trick then an internationally successful circus act