Old jokes. How about these? My first car was like Fred Flintstone’s. I play connect the dots on my liver spots. I put tenderizer on my oatmeal. I didn’t watch The Land Before Time, I LIVED in it! I remember my first trip to the beach by crawling out of the ocean and growing legs. Who else has some?
“I did my military service with a bow and arrow.” “My social security number is 000-000-000”. And this joke only makes sense in Spanish: “I knew the Gulf of Mexico while it was still employed.” :D :D :D
Funny, I didn’t realize these were jokes till being told they were for geezers. Like old Garf, being one, geezer i mean, makes all the difference. Now, I like the dead sea joke. Cute.
Very hilarious…. Sundial meaning that person has to be very old like the early days of man where mechanics weren’t around yet (similar to what you see on the Flintstones when they look at their watches) and “Dead Sea” meaning it was alive and well like a young person before getting older and sick and then no longer alive. This person had to be alive at one point where the Dead Sea was “Alive Sea” or “Sick Sea” at the sea’s point in life. P.S. I used to have a sundial in my back yard!
When you were young, was your phone number “3” and the Great Wall of China just a small picket fence? Did you go to cat obedience school on a floating subcontinent?
I remember hearing that the Kids in the Hall got their name from when Sid Caesar would attribute a joke that didn’t work out to “the kids in the hall”. I wonder if these jokes would also be attributed to that?
The Sundial watch was a good deal for the dial and precision gnomon, but every trade merchant would nickel-and-dime you on the compass as well as calibration of the magnet.
codycab over 2 years ago
Old jokes. How about these? My first car was like Fred Flintstone’s. I play connect the dots on my liver spots. I put tenderizer on my oatmeal. I didn’t watch The Land Before Time, I LIVED in it! I remember my first trip to the beach by crawling out of the ocean and growing legs. Who else has some?
Clarence over 2 years ago
I agree with Garfield
Templo S.U.D. over 2 years ago
just three more days
i_am_the_jam over 2 years ago
“I did my military service with a bow and arrow.” “My social security number is 000-000-000”. And this joke only makes sense in Spanish: “I knew the Gulf of Mexico while it was still employed.” :D :D :D
Average Garfield Reader over 2 years ago
Good to know Garfield isn’t as old as we thought he is.
Comic Rating: 5/10 (meh)
stillfickled Premium Member over 2 years ago
I got the humor.
sacas over 2 years ago
I’m like Garfield when I see comments in this comment section . . .
alien011 over 2 years ago
So, now Garfield needs glasses, too?
BJ40 over 2 years ago
OUCH, such a very HARSH, reality TV show.
Imagine over 2 years ago
The Big Bang followed after the first time I ate beans. Sorry about that.
BlitzMcD over 2 years ago
So do I. It’s insulting, actually.
KernelLeak over 2 years ago
So Uncle Roy is still on TV… figures.
preacherman Premium Member over 2 years ago
Funny, I didn’t realize these were jokes till being told they were for geezers. Like old Garf, being one, geezer i mean, makes all the difference. Now, I like the dead sea joke. Cute.
blackman2732 over 2 years ago
The “Dead Sea” joke made me chuckle.
blakerl over 2 years ago
Garfield is only like 40 something that is still young. You can’t be a geezer until your over 65. That’s the Law.
Can't Sleep over 2 years ago
Hmmm. sounds like somebody heard about Mel Brooks’ “2,000-Year-Old Man” recordings with him and Carl Reiner.
2AndFour over 2 years ago
I see a lot of Trevor Noah in those jokes.
I'm Sad over 2 years ago
Very hilarious…. Sundial meaning that person has to be very old like the early days of man where mechanics weren’t around yet (similar to what you see on the Flintstones when they look at their watches) and “Dead Sea” meaning it was alive and well like a young person before getting older and sick and then no longer alive. This person had to be alive at one point where the Dead Sea was “Alive Sea” or “Sick Sea” at the sea’s point in life. P.S. I used to have a sundial in my back yard!
petermerck over 2 years ago
Garfield is getting so old he doesn’t get these new comedians.
Bookworm over 2 years ago
I’m so old I am only Able to walk with a Cain. . . .
Goat from PBS over 2 years ago
I’m so old, I tried to save Julius Caesar, I fought beside Alexander the Great, and I witnessed the invention of fire.
RussellCastine over 2 years ago
When you were young, was your phone number “3” and the Great Wall of China just a small picket fence? Did you go to cat obedience school on a floating subcontinent?
Tetonbil over 2 years ago
Rodney Dangerfield instantly came to mind! Lol!
CaveCat87 over 2 years ago
I remember hearing that the Kids in the Hall got their name from when Sid Caesar would attribute a joke that didn’t work out to “the kids in the hall”. I wonder if these jokes would also be attributed to that?
David_the_CAD over 2 years ago
Old jokes are not always the best jokes.
ChessPirate over 2 years ago
That’s OK, Garf, only us dino-sores get ’em… ッ
WCraft Premium Member over 2 years ago
Cue the commercials for Ensure and Reverse Mortgage Loans…
pearlyqim over 2 years ago
That’s hilarious!!
Squirrel Chaser over 2 years ago
Back when I was a young’n, broadband was a musical group whose members were all female.
Ba da tisshhh
karmakat01 over 2 years ago
old geezers can’t understand old geezer’s jokes. classic…after the memory, the humor goes often alongside HEARRING!
oakie817 over 2 years ago
George Burns line from around 1972
Katzi428 over 2 years ago
Did anyone notice that Garfield is looking at the comic audience in the last frame? And Hoooo boy did a lot of these ring true w/me!!
edeloriea14 over 2 years ago
Hard to find surviving comedians older than Mel Brooks.
WentHulk over 2 years ago
I don’t see the humor either.
robert39503 over 2 years ago
SSN’s have 9 digits, 000-00-0000.
RLinGoComics ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ #StopP2025 #StoptheUA&ILWars over 2 years ago
3 days left!! (late)
Danodanocompycompy Premium Member over 2 years ago
The Sundial watch was a good deal for the dial and precision gnomon, but every trade merchant would nickel-and-dime you on the compass as well as calibration of the magnet.
Garfield Fan 1949 over 2 years ago
Another one about being old, is Jim sick?
AndyMoser over 2 years ago
Welcome to “Who’s the Old Geezer Anyway?!” #comedy
jimboylan over 2 years ago
And then there was the politician who was so old that he had lived back in a time when he didn’t deserve to be convicted.