My mom was one for picking up obscure stuff in the news. She was retired, she was a recluse and she also had an off-beat sleeping habit. She would go to bed at 4 AM and get up about 10.
So she read every word in the local newspaper (they had newspapers back then) and she would listen to talk radio (yes, they had it back then too and although it was not extreme politically, it had enough weirdos on the air at 2 AM to fill a chapter of Q-Anon – like psychics that claim that the government is monitoring you activity by measuring your water pressure when you flush the toilet.) We also had the National Enquirer back then.
I was home on leave one time and she was talking to me about some obscure group of which I’ve never heard. After confronting me with me about other bits of arcane data that she picked up in her midnight listening, she stated, “What’s the matter with you? Don’t you know what’s going on in the world?”
I replied, “No mom, I’m just out in it.”
The water pressure thing is not off the wall. One ad agency looked at water pressure to determine when people were away from the TV. For example, it would drop rapidly at half times during football games. They compared water pressure with programming schedules and commercial breaks. This was before your smart TV tattled this information.
Imagine almost 3 years ago
“The Daily Thing”. Brilliant.
Pass me my Daily Thing.
sirbadger almost 3 years ago
Put your car on the end of a giant teeter totter. If the meteor hits just right, you’ll be launched into space.
Dirty Dragon almost 3 years ago
“Everything Must Go”
in-dubio-pro-rainbow almost 3 years ago
Last orders, please!
Cornelius Noodleman almost 3 years ago
The end of World is d.
Zykoic almost 3 years ago
Chiliastic.
whahoppened almost 3 years ago
End of the World? Then what are they going to do with $50?
Qiset almost 3 years ago
“I feel fine.”
Doug K almost 3 years ago
End of the World. This time it’s for real. (Would we lie?)
sandpiper almost 3 years ago
Can’t guarantee delivery.
dflak almost 3 years ago
My mom was one for picking up obscure stuff in the news. She was retired, she was a recluse and she also had an off-beat sleeping habit. She would go to bed at 4 AM and get up about 10.
So she read every word in the local newspaper (they had newspapers back then) and she would listen to talk radio (yes, they had it back then too and although it was not extreme politically, it had enough weirdos on the air at 2 AM to fill a chapter of Q-Anon – like psychics that claim that the government is monitoring you activity by measuring your water pressure when you flush the toilet.) We also had the National Enquirer back then.
I was home on leave one time and she was talking to me about some obscure group of which I’ve never heard. After confronting me with me about other bits of arcane data that she picked up in her midnight listening, she stated, “What’s the matter with you? Don’t you know what’s going on in the world?”
I replied, “No mom, I’m just out in it.”
The water pressure thing is not off the wall. One ad agency looked at water pressure to determine when people were away from the TV. For example, it would drop rapidly at half times during football games. They compared water pressure with programming schedules and commercial breaks. This was before your smart TV tattled this information.
Zebrastripes almost 3 years ago
Ignoring the obvious ….oh well
Ubintold almost 3 years ago
That’s a steal.
Ontman almost 3 years ago
We see what see what we want to see.
writerofstories almost 3 years ago
I’ve known people who were about this observant!
mindjob almost 3 years ago
I’d wait until they had a blow-out sale
cuzinron47 almost 3 years ago
It’s fake news anyway.
WCraft Premium Member almost 3 years ago
Warranty?
bobgreenwade almost 3 years ago
I can’t blame him for his nonchalance. When the world ends, it’ll be a surprise to everyone.
jolohre almost 3 years ago
Thank you, Mr. Unger. This is one of the funniest I’ve seen on this site for a long time.