Herman by Jim Unger for November 25, 2023

“What? And miss all this excitement??”

He has a duck decoy and she has coral snake decoys.

Ogden Nash said it best:

A hunter crouches in his blind, ’neath camouflage of every kind.

This full-grown man, with luck and pluck,

Is hoping to outwit a duck.

Yeah. Go home and leave him out there.

Ring-necked ducks are not in season.

She knew that would happen. She asked for the boredom and came prepared.

She thinks hunting is like a carnival side show. Ring the decoy and get a prize.

For the last three seasons, we’ve seen nothing but deer tracks; so I bring a book. But maybe that’s why I haven’t seen any deer.

Rubber duckie, you’re so fine

And I’m lucky that you’re mine

Rubber duckie, I’m awfully fond of you

—J. A. Moss

She’s really good at frisbee golf

It’s good thing she’s not armed.

What to play when cornhole doesn’t suit the conditions.