Last Kiss by John Lustig for January 03, 2024

Look under the cushions, that’s where I lose things.

Trace your steps back.

He should offer to help her look for it.

Ancient Chinese proverb. Virginity is like a balloon. One prick, all gone.

“Lost/Kept virginity”. A demeaning concept to commodity female sexuality and self worth based on a simple biological act. Based on male hierarchical ideals that progeny must be absolutely pure when women are essentially “owned” by their future husbands.

So it turn up sometime within nine months eh.

Sure, why not? It turned up 15 times before with the help of Dr. Hi Mann.

Quick! Get out the bloodhounds!

Probably named her pus$$y cat “Virginity”. And the cat ran off.

She’s not dealing with a “full deck” boyfriend! Lol

Tell him it must have happened one of the times you went horseback riding.

Now with modern tech…just like your cell phone – there’s “Find Your ….”

offer a reward…

Do you remember what it looked like?

Good one, John! Can’t believe I never heard it before.

I just hate it when I lose my virginity; it’s always in the last place I look

On “Big Bang Theory”, Leonard told Penny that action figures are worth more if they are kept mint-in-box. Penny said her mother told her the same thing about her virginity, but it was a lot more fun to take it out and play with it.

She may have lost her virginity … but at least she still has the box it came in!

“Geez, how did that happen?”

Did she check Lost and Found?

“Lost. Threw away with abandon. Let’s just leave it as gone.”

I’m assuming, next boyfriend?

You win some, you lose some,

“Eventually”? Guess she’s planning to “eventually” become a reborn virgin. But in the meantime . . . ?

Don’t laugh! The posh woman broke up with her middle class boyfriend and demanded back everything she had ever gifted him. At the extended family dinner he laid out all of the gifts she had ever given to him. Not satisfied, she asked if there was anything else of hers he had taken and not returned. As he turned to leave, in front of her parents, he said that he could not return her virginity.

It was lost just over there next to the slick line.

Kinda careless losing things like that. But I don’t think you can use an Apple Air Tag on a cherry.

“Paul, you never even had a chance to ‘help’ me out with that! In the first place, you know I like the guys with dark hair. And everyone knows that you do, too”.