A monkey is smoking a joint in a tree when a small lizard comes and asks to join it. They get really high and at one point the small lizard says it’s thirsty. The monkey tells him that there is a lake nearby and the lizard goes there.
At the lake there is an alligator. He sees the red eyes of the small lizard and says “heeeeyyy small lizard! I know what you’re doing… Where can I get some??” The lizard tells him about the monkey and points it to the tree, and there goes the alligator.
Arriving at the tree the alligator shouts ’heeeeyyy monkeeeey!" The very stoned monkey sees the alligator and says:
“HOLY MOLY SMALL LIZARD!! HOW MUCH WATER DID YOU DRINK?!?!”
Take care, may forgotten child actor Scotty “Actually We Were Not A Gang Per Se But I Left For Higher Heights Anyway” Beckettor be with you, and gesundheit.
If look at a map, the gulf is south, the Atlantic is east, harsher winters are north, there’s farm land to the west; plus there are fewer people to the west than in the east. What direction could/would they spread, but west?
One for today:- O’Brien comes staggering into Murphy’s pub, beat black and blue. Murphy stops wiping down the counter and exclaims, “O’Brien, what in the world happened? Who beat you up so bad?” “T’was Flynn did this t’me,” O’Brien replies.“Flynn?” Murphy replies, incredulously. “Why, that little squint could na’ have done this to you, unless he had somethin’ in his hand!”“That he did,” said O’Brien. “He had a fireplace poker in his hand.”
“But did ye not have anythin’ in your own hand?”
“I did indeed – Mrs. Flynn’s breast, and a thing of beauty it was…but Feckin’ useless in a battle.”
Down here in NC, there are a lot of"seeps"- ponds formed by ground water. They get clogged up with algae. Then comes the grasses, and over a LOT of years,soil gets built up.Pond> meadow> pine forest, then deciduous forests. That’s how Nature does it,the way the Creator planned it.
flashdrive1988 almost 2 years ago
The trees are following the sun … what else?
Templo S.U.D. almost 2 years ago
know of anyone who still uses Polaroid photography these days?
SWCarter almost 2 years ago
And Macaulay Culkin made $8 million for Richie Rich. The more he got, the worse the movies were.
Charlie Fogwhistle almost 2 years ago
A monkey is smoking a joint in a tree when a small lizard comes and asks to join it. They get really high and at one point the small lizard says it’s thirsty. The monkey tells him that there is a lake nearby and the lizard goes there.
At the lake there is an alligator. He sees the red eyes of the small lizard and says “heeeeyyy small lizard! I know what you’re doing… Where can I get some??” The lizard tells him about the monkey and points it to the tree, and there goes the alligator.
Arriving at the tree the alligator shouts ’heeeeyyy monkeeeey!" The very stoned monkey sees the alligator and says:
“HOLY MOLY SMALL LIZARD!! HOW MUCH WATER DID YOU DRINK?!?!”
Charlie Fogwhistle almost 2 years ago
A tree falls in the forest but doesn’t make a sound.
Hunter in camouflage gear: “WHAT THE HECK???!”
Tree: “I mean, AAAAAARGH, I fell!”
Charlie Fogwhistle almost 2 years ago
One Bored Tree to another:
“I think I’ll branch out.”
RavennaAl almost 2 years ago
Of course the trees are moving west. That’s where all the tree huggers are.
chaosed2 almost 2 years ago
Population density is far greater in the east. More people=less trees.
bookworm0812 almost 2 years ago
I watched both of those Home Alone movies on Sunday. Still banging hilarious!
Huckleberry Hiroshima almost 2 years ago
I’m sure Kanye will take credit for that shift.
Take care, may forgotten child actor Scotty “Actually We Were Not A Gang Per Se But I Left For Higher Heights Anyway” Beckettor be with you, and gesundheit.
198.23.5.11 almost 2 years ago
These days,8-year-olds ask "Who’s Maculay Culkin?
david.reichert almost 2 years ago
The idea that trees have butts is disturbing
poppacapsmokeblower almost 2 years ago
If look at a map, the gulf is south, the Atlantic is east, harsher winters are north, there’s farm land to the west; plus there are fewer people to the west than in the east. What direction could/would they spread, but west?
Dkram almost 2 years ago
A lot of trees went west a hundred plus years ago, yah know, “Westward Ho, the wagons”
\\//_
Ken Norris Premium Member almost 2 years ago
♫♪ These boots were made for walking…♫♪
tremaine53 almost 2 years ago
Trees migrating? The weather is better out west! Duh!
WCraft Premium Member almost 2 years ago
Liberals migrating from NY to CA.
ekke almost 2 years ago
So could not the Polaroid Corporation figure out that this was precisely WHY?
heathcliff2 almost 2 years ago
The trees no longer feel safe around the East or West coast.
Birdman47 almost 2 years ago
One for today:- O’Brien comes staggering into Murphy’s pub, beat black and blue. Murphy stops wiping down the counter and exclaims, “O’Brien, what in the world happened? Who beat you up so bad?” “T’was Flynn did this t’me,” O’Brien replies.“Flynn?” Murphy replies, incredulously. “Why, that little squint could na’ have done this to you, unless he had somethin’ in his hand!”“That he did,” said O’Brien. “He had a fireplace poker in his hand.”
“But did ye not have anythin’ in your own hand?”
“I did indeed – Mrs. Flynn’s breast, and a thing of beauty it was…but Feckin’ useless in a battle.”
sedrelwesley2 Premium Member almost 2 years ago
Could it be…CLIMATE CHANGE??? Nah…
Thorby almost 2 years ago
Down here in NC, there are a lot of"seeps"- ponds formed by ground water. They get clogged up with algae. Then comes the grasses, and over a LOT of years,soil gets built up.Pond> meadow> pine forest, then deciduous forests. That’s how Nature does it,the way the Creator planned it.
davidthoms1 almost 2 years ago
Acid rain from midwest power plants is making the east coast unfriendly to trees.