That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for September 23, 2020

This is not what Ishmael expected when they told him he was going to be taught how to use the sextant.

“Hey Andy, this weather forecast says it’s supposed to be sunny and calm.”

Hey, Cap’n, when was the last time you had this thing calibrated? ‘Cause if this is reading right, we’re in Timbuktu.

Johnson was mostly happy with the new rain gear, except the metal pith helmet was freezing his skull out of his head

“Oh, crap! You’re metric, I’m English, and we’re lost!”

“Uh, Ensign Knittwitt, the instruction manual says you need the Sun, moon, or stars for that thing to work. Clouds don’t hack it. Think I’ll go below, drink some rum with the mates, and get ready for tomorrow’s mutiny.”

“Damn! My iPad battery is dead. “

“I told you, electronics and salt spray don’t mix. Corrodes the hell out of circuitry.”

cain’t figger out these newfangled harpoons no how…

‘Go sextant yourself!’

“Skipper, I think we’re lost.”

“Gilligan!!”

“I don’t care what type of measurements you take with that! I saw the man in Nantucket and it was this big!”

II thought I heard somebody snicker/ if he’s seasick, he’ll be a lot sicker/ I’m in no mood to dicker/ with some dick in a slicker/ ’cause my boat bears a Biden sticker..

Hold your little mannikin still and I’ll take a photo of him.

Before I use this dirty sextant/ on which microbes are visibly extant/ though the winds may be rising/ it needs sanitizing/with a brush, and a strong disinfextant (sic)

The internet is down again,

It was a dark and stormy night. Suddenly, a shot rang out. Turned out it was just a sextant shooting a star.

We the hicowee.

“I’ll be right with you Captain, I’m on level 10 Candy Crush.”

“Uh-oh. Your reading and my sextant app’s don’t agree.

Dear Mom, Having a whale of a good time on the boat with the boys. That said, there’s something fishy about the ship’s sturgeon. He’s way too keen on the daily health of our scallops and eel. Anyway, I’ll sign off with the traditional sailor’s closing “Don’t bonefish, hold on till we reach port” Ahab

Eight Bells: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:WinslowHomer-Eight_Bells_1886.jpg 

has info and links that point to info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting.

http://www.artcyclopedia.com/artists/homer_winslow.html 

http://www.sai.msu.su/cjackson/homer/homer_bio.htm 

http://www.all-art.org/history458-2.html 

https://www.wga.hu/bio_m/h/homer/biograph.html 

https://www.wikiart.org/en/winslow-homer 

https://www.the-athenaeum.org/people/detail.php?ID=91 

https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/495/winslow-homer 

http://www.avictorian.com/homer_winslow.html 

http://totallyhistory.com/winslow-homer/ 

https://learningenglish.voanews.com/a/winslow-homer-1836-1910-americas-painter-99052589/115630.html 

https://www.sullivangoss.com/artists/winslow-homer-1836-1910 

http://www.visual-arts-cork.com/famous-artists/winslow-homer.htm 

http://hoocher.com/Winslow_Homer/Winslow_Homer.htm 

all have info, or links that point to more info, about this artist, perhaps in addition to what’s pointed to by the title URL. So far, 12 works by him have been used here (13 times, including 1 repeat). 

https://www.gocomics.com/that-is-priceless/2020/06/26?comments=visible 

has the prior work (another artist info URL, the 6th of which may be unresponsive, has been included here – has a section about this painting).

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (⌘- or Ctrl-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #2541 (September 22, 2020) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment.

“Don’t need a weatherman to see which way the Winslow.” (sorry, Bob)

George signed on because they led him to believe he would be working with the sex-tent.

“Yeah, the last time we used apple maps™ we ended up aground in downtown Manhattan… "

“If my calculations are correct, we need to turn left – I mean starboard – at the next atoll with a Starbucks.”

Have you tried unplugging it and plugging it back in?

“The north star should be right behind that bank of clouds, or somewhere around that direction. Maybe behind us. Don’t worry. We’re not lost.”

Maybe they are using the Bellman’s Chart, “A perfect and absolute blank!”

the way the weather looks, i am glad we are still tied up at the dock.

What do you think of the new face of Mrs. Paul’s ?

“Yeah… You’re definitely looking the wrong way.”