Read an article about burglars breaking into a house with two large dogs and multiple small dogs. Big dogs hid, little dogs sent the bad boys racing for their lives.
We have an alarm, but our parrots make such a racket whenever someone approaches the house (they think they are warning me of impending doom, I think). Most of our neighbours, even a block away, can hear that someone has “crossed a line” at our house. I think we could get rid of the alarm, but the birds have to sleep sometime. :P
Late one night, a burglar broke into a house. He tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a voice say; “Jesus is watching you.”
Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward again. Again he heard “Jesus is watching you”.
The burglar stopped dead in his tracks. He looked all around the room. In a dark corner, he spotted a bird cage and in the cage was a parrot. He asked the parrot: “Was that you who said Jesus is watching me?”
“Yes,” Said the parrot.
The burglar breathed a sigh of relief, then asked the parrot: “What is your name?”
“Clarence,” said the bird.
“That is a dumb name for a parrot,” sneered the burglar. “What idiot named you Clarence?”
The parrot said, “The same idiot who named the rottweiller Jesus.”
We used to have a pit-boxer mix named Brinks. She looked – and sounded – as if she would tear you to shreds and eat you up, but she was really a devout coward. She’d been rescued from a fight ring when she was about ten weeks old and was terrified of strange men. A delivery man once remarked on how lovely our place is, but asked if we worried about burglars, since we are fairly isolated.
“Nah. We have a really good alarm system. Brinks”
The delivery man was only semi-convinced, so Hubby told him to tap on the bay window. The dog appeared out of nowhere, barking madly. The poor guy levitated backwards about six feet.
She died of something similar to sickle cell anemia when she was five. I didn’t cry when my father died the way I cried when we lost Brinks.
Many years ago, HBO had a short film made from the viewpoint of a burglar. While approaching a house, all you can hear is a parrot repeating “come on in, nobody’s home.” The bird is sitting on its perch with a Doberman sitting next to the perch. The dog never moves. The burglar is a little startled by the dog at first but then realizes he isn’t moving even when he is completely inside. He goes about his business, loading up his bag, and as he is leaving, he says to the bird “what have you got to say for yourself now, you stupid bird?” The bird simply replies “sic’em”. The last you hear is the dog growling, glass breaking, and the burglar screaming.
I have three Havanese ( look like my picture), couldn’t take down a two year old, but they make enough noise to let me know to get the gun. Yup, Liberals have guns too.
Story from a few years ago……Nice couple adopted a Lab from a shelter. A few months after that thieves broke into their home. The thieves took everything but the dog’s toys and left a note about how much fun the Lab was to play with. Couple was understandably upset, so a few days later they went back to the shelter and adopted another dog. Kept the Lab too.
PSA: If someone comes to your door to talk about alarm systems, never tell them anything about what kind of security (or lack thereof) you might have. While they may be legit, they could also be a burglar gathering info on potential targets.
Bengal over 2 years ago
Read an article about burglars breaking into a house with two large dogs and multiple small dogs. Big dogs hid, little dogs sent the bad boys racing for their lives.
M2MM over 2 years ago
I love the dog’s expression. :D
M2MM over 2 years ago
We have an alarm, but our parrots make such a racket whenever someone approaches the house (they think they are warning me of impending doom, I think). Most of our neighbours, even a block away, can hear that someone has “crossed a line” at our house. I think we could get rid of the alarm, but the birds have to sleep sometime. :P
Gent over 2 years ago
Barking doggies seldom bite. This one not barks.
I AM CARTOON LADY! over 2 years ago
Years ago I printed a, Beware of dogs, sign and hung it in my window. It read- ’Our Dogs Love Burglars…with Cheese!
Gameguy49 Premium Member over 2 years ago
They would hear the burglars scream until they stopped breathing anyway.
kv450 over 2 years ago
Late one night, a burglar broke into a house. He tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a voice say; “Jesus is watching you.”
Silence returned to the house, so the burglar crept forward again. Again he heard “Jesus is watching you”.
The burglar stopped dead in his tracks. He looked all around the room. In a dark corner, he spotted a bird cage and in the cage was a parrot. He asked the parrot: “Was that you who said Jesus is watching me?”
“Yes,” Said the parrot.
The burglar breathed a sigh of relief, then asked the parrot: “What is your name?”
“Clarence,” said the bird.
“That is a dumb name for a parrot,” sneered the burglar. “What idiot named you Clarence?”
The parrot said, “The same idiot who named the rottweiller Jesus.”
flemmingo over 2 years ago
I have protection that you don’t have to feed. You can take it for a walk or you can take it for a ride. It’s name is Glock 21!
pekenpug over 2 years ago
My Sheltie mix would go straight for the eardrums. My Peke would go for the ankles. And my Pom would keep score and be cheerleader.
Dani Rice over 2 years ago
We used to have a pit-boxer mix named Brinks. She looked – and sounded – as if she would tear you to shreds and eat you up, but she was really a devout coward. She’d been rescued from a fight ring when she was about ten weeks old and was terrified of strange men. A delivery man once remarked on how lovely our place is, but asked if we worried about burglars, since we are fairly isolated.
“Nah. We have a really good alarm system. Brinks”
The delivery man was only semi-convinced, so Hubby told him to tap on the bay window. The dog appeared out of nowhere, barking madly. The poor guy levitated backwards about six feet.
She died of something similar to sickle cell anemia when she was five. I didn’t cry when my father died the way I cried when we lost Brinks.
Nubmaeme over 2 years ago
Many years ago, HBO had a short film made from the viewpoint of a burglar. While approaching a house, all you can hear is a parrot repeating “come on in, nobody’s home.” The bird is sitting on its perch with a Doberman sitting next to the perch. The dog never moves. The burglar is a little startled by the dog at first but then realizes he isn’t moving even when he is completely inside. He goes about his business, loading up his bag, and as he is leaving, he says to the bird “what have you got to say for yourself now, you stupid bird?” The bird simply replies “sic’em”. The last you hear is the dog growling, glass breaking, and the burglar screaming.
Bill The Nuke over 2 years ago
We’ve had Great Danes and Dobermanns. Both were great family dogs and great protectors.
Zen-of-Zinfandel over 2 years ago
Get motion sensor lights, at the very leashed.
WCraft Premium Member over 2 years ago
Give him a demonstration.
Diane Lee Premium Member over 2 years ago
I have three Havanese ( look like my picture), couldn’t take down a two year old, but they make enough noise to let me know to get the gun. Yup, Liberals have guns too.
Plods with ...™ over 2 years ago
There’s some inappropriate TikToks on this very subject. what do you have close at hand if someone broke into your house?….
rscjc over 2 years ago
Story from a few years ago……Nice couple adopted a Lab from a shelter. A few months after that thieves broke into their home. The thieves took everything but the dog’s toys and left a note about how much fun the Lab was to play with. Couple was understandably upset, so a few days later they went back to the shelter and adopted another dog. Kept the Lab too.
amaneaux over 2 years ago
PSA: If someone comes to your door to talk about alarm systems, never tell them anything about what kind of security (or lack thereof) you might have. While they may be legit, they could also be a burglar gathering info on potential targets.
raybarb44 over 2 years ago
However, if you happen to know a business that cleans up blood stains from carpets and things, I’d appreciate their name…..
PPMKS over 2 years ago
Not a problem here. My home is protected by Smith and Wesson.
Sailor46 USN 65-95 over 2 years ago
I have four, the burglar is in great danger, of being licked to death.