I hate cleaning up after myself. I think I’d get homicidal if I had to clean up after a grown man who never cleaned up after himself, especially after 10 YEARS of it.
Words never change men. It just doesn’t work. Pick up after yourself and your kids and leave his stuff alone. When you feel frustrated, tell him he’s on kid-duty and go shopping or to a movie or get a beer or whatever. No yelling or arguing, just go. Then come home happy and ignore the mess.
John is a jerk. Pure and simple. Men who like to blame women’s irritability on the time of the month or some other woman’s issue are just trying to deny the truth to himself that he has done something wrong. I had a friend who mopped the floor and her husband came in and tracked mud all over the clean floor. When she griped at him for it he asked if she were on her time of the month. See what I mean? It can’t be that HE did anything wrong, but that SHE must be having a woman’s issue. John is just this sort of jerk. If I were Elly I think I’d be walking out on him quite often and finding somewhere to go until I calmed down. Otherwise he’d find himself with a lot of black and blue marks.
It’s called discipline. Michael is certainly old enough to learn it (e.g. no TV until you clean your room) and John should know better unless he wants to be in the doghouse and that will be a test of HIS hormones.
And then be sure to tell him he’ll never figure it out, because the contempt you are teaching him toward women means no one will ever bother to marry him.
messy home? It has to be pretty bad. My ex sister-in-law was a hoarder pothead with mental problems. One day they got a visit from child protective services and the children were taken. She had to move out before the children were returned. Even the authorities agreed that this was about the worst “messy house” they had ever seen.
When my son was about 13, he was in trouble for something (I don’t remember what) and I was angry. He asked me if I was on my period. It was the only time in his life that he got backhanded across the face. We had a discussion about appropriate comments, and he never did it again.
When I got married all those years ago, I thought picking up after my family was written into my marriage contract. Since I love a tidy house, I still pick up their stuff. I don’t mind it. Now if you asked me what I DO mind……..
I’m with EL, where does it say that marriage means ONLY the woman cleans. I know she is a stay at home mom, but both guys are old enough to clean their own _____ so it is frustrating. She doesn’t have three toddlers.
As paternalistic as the posters on this board are, I’m glad we don’t live under the rule of the Taliban and similar women-hating groups. Women in those countries aren’t regarded as human beings and can be killed for whatever reason a husband or father wants to use.
I can never get my boyfriend to believe that these hormones actually make a difference. He says I’m making it up, especially when I tell him they’re the reason why I can’t speak correct Spanish sometimes :-)In fact, it’s been shown that they influence your language as well as your parking skills!
Templo S.U.D. over 11 years ago
If it were hormones, April would be about conceived already.
LeslieBark over 11 years ago
I hate cleaning up after myself. I think I’d get homicidal if I had to clean up after a grown man who never cleaned up after himself, especially after 10 YEARS of it.
cdward over 11 years ago
She does NOT have to clean up after him. That’s her choice. She only has to clean up after herself.
hildigunnurr Premium Member over 11 years ago
the sooner Mike learns to pick up after himself, the lesser likely he’ll end up being like his dad…
jeanie5448 over 11 years ago
AMEN!!!
Beleck3 over 11 years ago
john has the tact of a bulldog in a china shop.
coffeeturtle over 11 years ago
you want to put her in a better mood? pitch in guys, really.
dogday Premium Member over 11 years ago
At least we have moments of sanity. Men like you, however, only get better once in their lives. At the end.
terra.cripe over 11 years ago
Words never change men. It just doesn’t work. Pick up after yourself and your kids and leave his stuff alone. When you feel frustrated, tell him he’s on kid-duty and go shopping or to a movie or get a beer or whatever. No yelling or arguing, just go. Then come home happy and ignore the mess.
alondra over 11 years ago
John is a jerk. Pure and simple. Men who like to blame women’s irritability on the time of the month or some other woman’s issue are just trying to deny the truth to himself that he has done something wrong. I had a friend who mopped the floor and her husband came in and tracked mud all over the clean floor. When she griped at him for it he asked if she were on her time of the month. See what I mean? It can’t be that HE did anything wrong, but that SHE must be having a woman’s issue. John is just this sort of jerk. If I were Elly I think I’d be walking out on him quite often and finding somewhere to go until I calmed down. Otherwise he’d find himself with a lot of black and blue marks.
Say What? Premium Member over 11 years ago
It’s called discipline. Michael is certainly old enough to learn it (e.g. no TV until you clean your room) and John should know better unless he wants to be in the doghouse and that will be a test of HIS hormones.
Argy.Bargy2 over 11 years ago
You know why they call it ‘low T’? It’s because most of those who suffer from it can’t pronounce ‘testosterone’
Argy.Bargy2 over 11 years ago
You know why they call the mental state of men who go ballistic while driving ‘road rage’? ‘Low T’ was already taken.
Argy.Bargy2 over 11 years ago
And then be sure to tell him he’ll never figure it out, because the contempt you are teaching him toward women means no one will ever bother to marry him.
Toxicdave over 11 years ago
Around my house it’s referred to PMP – Pre Menstrual Psychosis.
Argy.Bargy2 over 11 years ago
So leave.You aren’t doing her a favor by sticking around. Anyone who thinks he’s with a ‘little’ woman shouldn’t be there, anyway.
AndiJ over 11 years ago
My husband is the one that doesn’t like a messy house, but would he ever pick it up? Noooo. Also am I the only woman who doesn’t get PMS?? :P
Trina Talma Premium Member over 11 years ago
Personally I hope they’re building up to an entirely new plotline where Elly murders her sexist pig of a husband in his sleep.
route66paul over 11 years ago
messy home? It has to be pretty bad. My ex sister-in-law was a hoarder pothead with mental problems. One day they got a visit from child protective services and the children were taken. She had to move out before the children were returned. Even the authorities agreed that this was about the worst “messy house” they had ever seen.
JanLC over 11 years ago
When my son was about 13, he was in trouble for something (I don’t remember what) and I was angry. He asked me if I was on my period. It was the only time in his life that he got backhanded across the face. We had a discussion about appropriate comments, and he never did it again.
summerdog86 over 11 years ago
When I got married all those years ago, I thought picking up after my family was written into my marriage contract. Since I love a tidy house, I still pick up their stuff. I don’t mind it. Now if you asked me what I DO mind……..
Gokie5 over 11 years ago
I recall getting all crysy-in-beersy with PMS. My whole family was grouchy, though, so I was in good company.
barister over 11 years ago
I’m with EL, where does it say that marriage means ONLY the woman cleans. I know she is a stay at home mom, but both guys are old enough to clean their own _____ so it is frustrating. She doesn’t have three toddlers.
Argy.Bargy2 over 11 years ago
As paternalistic as the posters on this board are, I’m glad we don’t live under the rule of the Taliban and similar women-hating groups. Women in those countries aren’t regarded as human beings and can be killed for whatever reason a husband or father wants to use.
jbmlaw01 over 11 years ago
richardwebster, that is the best line I’ve read this week. I will redistribute with attribution.
IQTech61 over 11 years ago
Typical males – blame it on hormones rather than take responsibility for cleaning up after themselves.
Adele Derwald over 11 years ago
I can never get my boyfriend to believe that these hormones actually make a difference. He says I’m making it up, especially when I tell him they’re the reason why I can’t speak correct Spanish sometimes :-)In fact, it’s been shown that they influence your language as well as your parking skills!
feefers_ about 1 year ago
It’s not hormones. It’s idle lazy guys who won’t tidy up