Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for July 22, 2017

It depends on what state you live in.

So if pig comes across as paranoid, does that make him twice as annoyed?

Unfortunately this joke doesn’t work in any other accent than American . . .

(In Australian English, “Para” and “Barely” don’t share any vowels).

“Paralegal”? I still don’t get it.

I believe Paris is saying that she has the best paralegals he’s ever seen.

Two barely-legals to go, please. Hot weekend planned.

The posts here are getting creepy.

See ya tomorrow!

Waste of perfectly good coffee

“Barely” legal is still legal.

Feeling cynical. “Dating”….doesn’t that mean, ‘sleeping with’….or, having sex with, FOR FREE?

Pig REALLY needs to get his hearing checked…

twin sister…paralegal pairs

Either way – way to go, Goat!

How would he date someone he hadn’t met?

But hats off to him for dating someone with a disability.

But is that measured in goat years?

Aren’t ‘paralegals’ airborne lawyers who are dropped into combat zones to sue our own paratroops….?

I live near Reno – Paradice?

I asked the kid, how tall are you – Parameter.

He was so ill that he needed – Paradox.

I’ll be leaving soon – Paragon.

Almost went to war – Parabellum

I’m close by – Parasite

Couldn’t get my axes perpendicular – Paragraph

“Barely legal” is still legal.

“Margaret came to me was all he saidBefore she knew my name she was in my bedShe was only sweet sixteenTwenty thousand days younger than me

“Marry me” she said I don’t reply“Daddy said you’d better, or you’ll die”She wants a house and fifteen kids I guessShe does my workAnd I can’t find a state we’re legal in"

Pig…………smh

Paradise. Gamblers idea of Heaven.

This may have been funny had the words, “she’s a”, before paralegal. Then pig would have hit him and replied, “she’s bare n illegal”. Sometimes he misses by a mile. It’s like my wife working in the garden this morning and me asking if she like to go to Lowes for plants. She replied, “I have to start what I finish”.

Did he have an ex girlfriend called “Ill-Legal”?

xxx

Pig, or self-righteous prig?

Pig thinks Goat is too old for this “barely legal” girl?

Oh, Pig. Sometimes (most times, actually) you are such a dimwit. Or parawit. Or twit….

20 cents – paradigm

There is a jail sentence between dating twenty-five year old girls, and dating twenty five year old girls.

“Barely legal” is still legal, but there’s legal, and then there’s creepy. If one of my 16 year-old grandsons hooked up with a 15 year old girl, it would apparently be illegal here in Michigan, although quite unlikely to be prosecuted. If I hooked up with one of their 16 year old classmates, it would be legal, but very, very creepy.

Is she blonde?