Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for September 01, 2018

Where do these hipsters get the money to pay higher rents?

(It’s a rhetorical question. We all know the answer.)

No, Brad and friend, you should run.

I hope Brad and his friend like “pineapple”.

Some day, Brad is going to look back on photos of him at this phase of his life and say: “Good lord, I actually thought I looked cool back then?”

I once knew a young man named Brad, who dressed a lot like that and had the same haircut. He had a pony-tail instead of the bun though. The style had something to do with music out of Portland Oregon and they didn’t drink $5 coffee. That was a bit over 25 years ago: I wonder if this Brad is his son.

Have them all live beside Larry Croc………Croc Power

For some reason that last frame is a lot funnier if read with a German or Swedish accent.

Oh, hell. Aim for the one with the man-bun.

Last year, in Denver’s LoDo, I saw an octogenarian with a ‘man bun’…Sucks that he has enough hair to do that.

Are hipsters invading Stephan’s neighborhood? And spaghetti is now $5 a pound because it’s “artisanal”? I hate that.

But am I the only old guy who wishes people would stop attacking “man-buns”? Honestly, Baby Boomers have some nerve to attack weird hairstyles. I used to have a mullet. My brother used to have a giant afro, and he’s a white guy.

“I want it long, straight, curly, fuzzy,Snaggy, shaggy, ratty, matty,Oily, greasy, fleecy,Shining, gleaming, streaming,Flaxen, waxen,Knotted, polka-dotted,Twisted, beaded, braided,Powdered, flowered, and confettied,Bangled, tangled, spangled, and spaghettied.”

Remember that? What happened to y’all? Receding hairlines?

This could be about Denver

Oh say can you see my eyes, if you can then my hair’s too short.

Oh, great. More of the freak show

Pastis is a bitter old man, LOL.

Blow them up, General!

Get a HAIRCUT, get a REAL job.

Guessing that, cause the rents are soaring, people want to fly….. away.

Rat’s view: The rents are soaring, like an eagle.My view: The rents are dropping, like the eagle’s --.

No, you guys, just duck!

Interesting, the man bun hipster with the tribal earlobes doesn’t seem to have a mouth. I wonder how he eats and lives. Maybe he’s an Android, a synthetic so to speak.

Hey, it’s Li’l Rent Control Duck!

Yay! Guard Duck is back. I love you Guard Duck!!!

Is that a man bun or a Davey Crocket hat?

Handgrenade isn’t that scary. Get some hedge clipper and chase the guys with man-buns; that would put fear into them!

There are often protests against “gentrification” (the hipsters moving in and the rents and house prices going way up), but Li’l Guard Duck’s fragging them works for me!

yay!!!!! guard duck is back!!!!!

YEAH! GET THEM, GUARD DUCK!

My son! You have returned!

Oh, no! The gentrifiers have landed! Flee!