Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for August 21, 2019

Oh, come on… even my first pancakes were better than that. And I was only six!

Whose half-baked ideas WERE these?

Then it’s not just me? Thank goodness!

In the Boy Scouts, I always had a policy of feeding the youngest kids first. For every meal. They were far more likely to whine, less patient for anything, AND they made good recipients for the first rejects. “Trail flavoring” we would call it.

I always love the first one with pancakes or crêpes. Perhaps it is due to the butter/oil . . . I butter and syrup it before it cools down!

Four pankaces from four households without dogs.

I must be doing something wrong. All of my pancakes come out round. First, last, and in between.

The trick is, use a dry skillet and put the oil in the batter. Works much better.

My first ones are in there somewhere! Two and beyond come out great!

I hate when the first one sticks and when I try to flip it I kinda slice it in half and then I have to give it to Bucky. He loves pancakes and doesn’t care.

At least they’re not waffling about who has it the worst.

Take it easy with the complaining – you don’t want to cause a flap, Jack!

When dealing with low self-esteem problems a little flattery works wonders.

bad rehearsal… good show

“And I don’t know a soul who’s not been battered;

I don’t have a friend who feels at ease."

—Paul Simon

They still taste fine as long as they’re not burned.

Listen guys, so we’re different, doesn’t mean we’re not good….pass the syrup

Mine’s at Denny’s.

My brother-in-law has been making horribly flat pancakes. He says he makes his own buttermilk with vinegar and milk.

My mother always used to preface pouring her first pancake with “first one’s for the pan,” which I never understood. Me — I make long, skinny pancakes that I pick up and dip into a small bowl of warm maple syrup.

Looks aren’t everything…don’t judge a book by it’s cover.

Hey… that one in the middle looks just like my oldest brother.

God I hate pancakes!

I once had a first pancake turn out perfect. I should have gone out right away and bought a PowerBall ticket.

I saw something like this through a microscope. One’s legs weren’t pseudo. It gave me the finger.

My last ones usually end up like that since the pan is super hot from the previous ones and the oil has been used up.

I remember I poured mine in a circle at it spread out even farther to the point where light could make it thru the pancake. I was like 11 or 12.