Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for May 01, 2020

And there are no sports to distract us.

South China Sea! Russian intercepts! Earthquake warnings!

Don’t watch the news, Goat.

I hope someone is recording the major events this year, so that when it’s finally over they can make a “We Didn’t Start The Fire” style recap of it all.

Pearls melt in champagne.

Now if I cou;d just get my housemate to stop blaring MSNBC every waking hour.

The Politicians are going to ban the public from public parks and beaches, then claim ownership under squatter’s rights.

Like I said, this is what the next gag should be: The characters are wearing their maskies; Rat says “I like how I can’t see your faces. Because you’re ugly.” You’re welcome, Pastis!

“Why do you wear a mask and hood?“

I think everybody will in the near future,” was the man in black’s reply. "They’re terribly comfortable.”

― William Goldman, The Princess Bride 1973

Some people drop “F” bombs, which can get quite as bad…

Well, I haven’t had an asteroid land on me. By my way of thinking, I’m ahead of the game.

We’re gone be dropping Snake and Nap … Stay in your hole ! … Croc Power !

Time for the Happy Box again.

Comment I saw elsewhere: Anyone else feel like life is being written by a 4th grader right now? And there was this virus and everyone was scared. And then the world ran out of toilet paper. Yeah, and then there was no school for like a month and then it snowed.

You stay out of this, Rat

Debbie Downer.

find Dave Barry / Miami Herald end of year review in November if we are still alive

may cheer you up for a while

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T7hHx7gdN68

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zUUtf7gOe8

Facing truth and reality…..something the 42% need to do

more 80s cheesiness and techno-pop music if that makes you happy (it makes me happy) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b9xBAtCsCTQ

Since when does Rat sympathize with anybody?

Tell me when it’s safe to come out from under my basement steps.

No news is good news.

Rat has a knack for the mot juste.

Did you see how many people usually die? And that’s not even counting covid-19

Worry Bombs away!

A radio station gives the virus numbers every half-hour.. like Chinese water torture.

Can’t think of any ‘green’ poems, but…

I never saw a Purple Cow,I never hope to see one;But I can tell you, anyhow,I’d rather see than be one(by Gelett Burgess)