Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for May 27, 2020

Remember not to pig out at dinner.

But what about Dick?

The table was turned on you, Rat. Paris got your goat.

“Ralph”?

Sue could sue pat for harassment.

This was a category on Jeopardy! tonight. IIRC, it was called “When the verb is a name.”

Don’t let Rat get your Goat – Rat him out during the open Mike, then stick him with the Bill for the all the drinks you consumed getting Merry.

Then there’s Peter, Neil, Stu, Eddy, and Ted.

What about Russel, Stu, Frank (post a letter), Lance…..?

that’s gotta impact HR…

Don’t “Stew” in your juices over it!

LOL! Rat did not think that one through!

“There’s no noun that cannot be verbed.” (Calvin)

Do not hire that guy Benjamin Dover as he can moonlight as a phrasal verb…..

That Ro needs a dent!

If I moonlighted as a verb based on my middle name (with a somewhat different spelling), I would “chop or cut (something, especially wood or coal) with an axe, pick, or other tool.”

You should also not hire a Harry, unless you are looking for a fight.

also, never hire the guys from the Abbot and Costello’s “Who’s on First” gag, you’ll end up with a lotta headaches.

I’d think you’d want to hire them as verbs. You’d get employees with a “bias for action”!

Sue, of course, would be your lawyer.

Yes Rat you are one of a kind ! … Croc Power !

Goat could be the G.O.A.T.

Most of them can moonlight as nouns too

Multi-talented employees

Ralph: Vomit, spew, hurl, up-chuck, hoark, technicolor yawn, shout at your shoes, bark at the ants, deliver a street pizza……

Someone needs to Nick Pastis. Then Ralph on him.

It may not be your name but you could still be Randy.

I sometimes think that is how people read a resume

Ralph was listed but what about his brother Hurl?

Coincidence that this was a category on Jeopardy yesterday!

‘Ralph’ is sadly a slang term for vomiting. And I say ‘sadly’ because that was the name of one of my grandfathers. Goat is telling Rat as usual to be careful about what he says about others, as should we all.

Sally

“I am an exception.”

No, that would be Al. He’s Exception Al.

Watch that guy Jimmy or your windows could be pried open!

Slip (Bowery Boys); Snoop (Dog); Bat (Masterson)…

That really got Paris’ goat!

Ba dum bum.

A lot of people named Karen have been getting fired lately.

Obviously watched “Jeopardy!” yesterday.

Hey I’m a Rob…

That’s some goat rule there.

It’s never a good thing when Mrs. Baker uses my name as a verb.

I’m deeply offended. (And fortunately, employed.)

I’m not a verb. I’m a noun. The chuck holds the point as the driver spins. Chuck that over the side & see if it floats.

Or Jimmy.

What does Goat work as?

Hey Rat! Too verbose!

Verbing nouns weirds language!

I grant you Rat, that you are exceptional. I dunno that it’s a Good Thing, though, in your case….