I absolutely hated that stuff they called “sports”. Okay to look at, but I was small, I had (and have) glasses and am best described as ambiklutztrous.
But I found the answer: I joined the marching band. Even a klutz (with rhythm) can march to the beat on flat ground, and (mostly) the band members were not intent on maiming the misfits. Not a single incident of ben-gay in the shorts, being stuffed into the trash barrel butt-down or having my glasses stolen. It was bliss. Even when we were marching in sub-freezing weather (with sub-freezing instruments, therefore). Compared with the alternative, anyway.
Perhaps a few testosterone injections would help suppress your survival instincts, Calvin! Added bonus: You’d be the only 7 year old around with a mustache.
I actually scored a touchdown that way once. Our quarterback was about to get sacked, did a hail mary, and somehow I wound up with the ball. I saw these living armored vehicles bearing down on me, turned and ran for my life. By sheer dumb luck, I was still holding on tot he ball and just happened to be running in the right direction. I didn’t even know I had done it until I saw the rest of the team cheering. My one and only moment of sports glory, and it was by accident.
BE THIS GUY over 4 years ago
Take up golf.
codycab over 4 years ago
Looks like we can rule out wrestling as well.
Roblox Lover! :P over 4 years ago
Calvin should hire Lio to get an invisible ghost and trip Hobbes up! Or he could just play Calvinball. Either way, it works
Alexander the Good Enough over 4 years ago
I never learned that, and I’m here to celebrate…
The Calvinosaurus That Calvin Wanted To Discover over 4 years ago
Or learn that when you’re on defense, you’re supposed to tackle the person with the ball instead of running away from them.
marilynnbyerly over 4 years ago
I call it intelligence. If some guy who weighs 150 pounds more than me wants the ball, I’ll hand it to him politely and step out of his way.
Renatus Profuturus Frigeridus Premium Member over 4 years ago
Looking at panel #2 he has a great future as high or long jumper .
Concretionist over 4 years ago
I absolutely hated that stuff they called “sports”. Okay to look at, but I was small, I had (and have) glasses and am best described as ambiklutztrous.
But I found the answer: I joined the marching band. Even a klutz (with rhythm) can march to the beat on flat ground, and (mostly) the band members were not intent on maiming the misfits. Not a single incident of ben-gay in the shorts, being stuffed into the trash barrel butt-down or having my glasses stolen. It was bliss. Even when we were marching in sub-freezing weather (with sub-freezing instruments, therefore). Compared with the alternative, anyway.
Robin Harwood over 4 years ago
Stick with the survival instincts. You’ve got them for a reason.
BigDaveGlass over 4 years ago
Well he is a tiger when all said and done…
PhilipOlson over 4 years ago
The heck with the better part of valor, it is living to fight another day that has me sold on the concept.
hariseldon59 over 4 years ago
It’s just as well considering the frequency and consequences of concussions in professional football.
admiree2 over 4 years ago
You might have had a future as a sponsored video game player, Calvin. Just born before your time to make joystick history.
jpayne4040 over 4 years ago
Don’t sweat it. Sports aren’t for everyone, Calvin. In fact, they aren’t for most people!
su43dipta over 4 years ago
You mean your “flight or flight” instincts?
Red33410 over 4 years ago
“It’s clear a career in sports will elude me until someone teaches me to ignore my survival instincts.”
ForrestOverin over 4 years ago
Perhaps a few testosterone injections would help suppress your survival instincts, Calvin! Added bonus: You’d be the only 7 year old around with a mustache.
Auntie Socialist over 4 years ago
Six…?
A Hip loving Canadian... over 4 years ago
33…27…18… Hey, that’s my locker combination!
jel354 over 4 years ago
Pounce on that ball, Calvin.
gantech over 4 years ago
I actually scored a touchdown that way once. Our quarterback was about to get sacked, did a hail mary, and somehow I wound up with the ball. I saw these living armored vehicles bearing down on me, turned and ran for my life. By sheer dumb luck, I was still holding on tot he ball and just happened to be running in the right direction. I didn’t even know I had done it until I saw the rest of the team cheering. My one and only moment of sports glory, and it was by accident.
Indianapolis Smith over 4 years ago
Hmmm… sounds like track. Someone fires a pistol and you run like mad away from it.
vaughnrl2003 Premium Member over 4 years ago
Self sacrifice is the hallmark of good teamwork. Just try not to leave a mark in the hall.
kab2rb over 4 years ago
Me either, and not into sports.
raybarb44 over 4 years ago
You will never have a career in any field if you don’t overcome your fear. That’s a Life Lesson…..
WCraft Premium Member over 4 years ago
Don’t despair. A common reaction is to run from a charging tiger.
donwestonmysteries over 4 years ago
Stick with your instincts. Hobbes could change the rules any minute and score 6 points off a tackle.
Mediatech over 4 years ago
As Sun Tzu said: “Supreme excellence in warfare is to defeat the enemy without fighting.” Well done Hobbes.
Robert4170 over 4 years ago
A bit misleading on Calvin’s part. Not every sport involves players deliberately physically attacking each other.
Troglodyte over 4 years ago
When it’s time to take a hike…take a hike, Cal.
Rose Madder Premium Member over 4 years ago
Calvin really doesn’t have any athletic skills – he’s more of a ‘talking heads’ type. Maybe he is on ESPN etc. and just changed his name.
Ka`ōnōhi`ula`okahōkūmiomio`ehiku Premium Member over 4 years ago
Said no football player ever.
Sailor46 USN 65-95 over 4 years ago
We each survive in our own way.
lindz.coop Premium Member over 4 years ago
Not if you insist on playing with a tiger.
swarms17 over 4 years ago
I want to know the numbers.What are they for ?