Off the Mark by Mark Parisi for January 23, 2021

She comes on like a rose,

But everybody knows,

She get you and such.

You can look but you better not touch!

Poison Ivy,

Poison Ivy,

Late at night while your sleepin’,

Poison Ivy comes a creepin’ around.

Jerry Leiber / Mike Stoller

Is that a stalk of asparagus, or are you just happy to seed me.

The Green Giant got attacked by avocado pickers again.

Ho Ho Ho!

Eh? The Tree Hulk?

I like the Faster Pussycat version.

how do they tell if he’s better if his skin is green…?

No Com-plants.

b’dum tsschht.

They better have a bedpan ready in case he has to pea…

We’ll have you jolly again in no time.

Isn’t he already in a persistent vegetable state…?

I’m Batman.

HO HO HO!

NO NO NO HO HO HO!

Ho Ho Ho Green Giant

You’d never catch him smoking weed.

Just hook him up to a pot plant, feel better faster.

Hope it’s not a poison I V.

GROAN***

Jolly Green Giant, Kingsmen

Took a sec… then the groan lasted a long time

ho ho ho

I bet he’d like to hook up with (Poison) Ivy…