Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for May 18, 2021

To the right.

P3 Well, I just finished a romp in the filing room with Mrs. Wampfler!!!

P3.5 well, I’m going to apply for the library board position and go “mad dog in a meathouse” on your old man, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA…AAHAHAHAHAHAHA…

P1 It’s disappointing like your pitching Zane(y), last I heard the only people who realize or care the position even exists are the people on the board, some guy in Denver, the two of us and the guy that applied

P2 Something you should know? Other than the guy hates you just because and wants to eliminate your job? No, nothing to see here move along

P3 I’m calling you from our favorite make out spot, what are you wearing?

Hey Bulldog — If your election lasts more than four hours, call Jack Hanna. Softball fatales about to cross into WNBA activism, Milford style. “Nothing can change the shape of things to come.”

P1, And just like that Insane Zane becomes Disappointing Zane.

P2, That’s highly doubtful, Marion The Librarian.

P3, Um, why is there a tree growing in the middle of the library?

And funds start rolling in to the candidate’s war chests. Publishers bankroll Zane – who wants to expand the library’s holdings, while a developer who wants to bulldoze the library and put up a tanning salon slips cash to Brito.

P1- It’s disappointing. The periodicals section.

P2- Highly disappointing. The microfiche collection.

P3.5- Kibbles & Bits, Kibbles & Bits, gotta have me some Kibbles & Bits.

Go Zane! We don’t want no stinking accountability on our library board. We only want lap dogs to push the American Library Association’s agenda through unchecked in all libraries.

Gosh….where is Rubin going with this?

P3:“…you said you wanted me to be a bulldog? I just peed all over the floor!”

Only one candidate for the political springboard seat on the library board!!! Shocking

I’m not certain that Zane’s qualified to be on the library board- he doesn’t even has his high school diploma.

How can you be considered for the Board while blatantly violating the SHUSH! rule that exists in all libraries? Marion the Librarian is calling the police for this egregious phone use, and after Luhm sees all that pee on the floor, I expect Zane to get hit with the taser.

So why is Zane calling his GF? Or is Katy going to get her entire team behind him?

Somebody just buy the kid a laptop!

So, let me get this straight… you’re going to potentially imperil your relationship with your girl so that you can run against her father for the Library Board?

So… is Zane talking to Katy or to CK? (cue suspenseful chord on the Wurlitzer)

P4 – “Yeah, keep wishing. Cause I’m wimping out at confronting your dad just like I’m wimping out on my pitching.”

And speaking of wimping out, don’t wimp out and miss reading today’s Mopped Up Thorp.

https://moppedupthorp.wordpress.com/

and now for something completely different: Next game Zane bears down like a Bulldog and…has a stroke, just like his Dad.