Tarzan by Edgar Rice Burroughs for March 20, 2023

Flee while the “chimps” are down.

“You make me breakfast first….”

The Queen is built like a Nordic speedskater. D’Arnot doesn’t have a chance against those legs.

And she’s free to have prisoners brought to her rooms and dismiss the guards so it’s just her and the two strangers alone in her room?

Apes always give themselves away with weird chattering. It’s a hangover from their years in public office.

Larson: “Do you really think you can outrun the apes?"

Chiram: “No, I only need to outrun *you*".

I’m going with: “Ye must take me with ye as thee flee.”

Suddenly the apes break into song. “Hey, hey we’re the Monkees,and people say we monkey around.But we’re too busy singing,to put anybody down.”

C’mon, Chiram! Failing to check the gaping pit for giant homicidal gorillas the first time around might be excusable, but the second time? Dude, you deserve to be gorilla chow.

“. . . take me with you.”

“The condition is that ye teach me to speak like I’m not 500 years old.”

‘Closely’. I would define that differently…

Tarzan said, you got it, toots.

She’s so spreadable, she’s incredible! What a deal!!

It always one monkey business or the other in Tarzanland!

“That you ravage me.”

“I can help ye escape… under one condition.” And Tarzan thinks to himself, “Here we go again, another sexual harassment suit against a sexually aggressive African monarch, coming right up! Cha-Ching! This loincloth get up makes it almost too easy! But, what the hey, I could use a new blimp!”

Yup. She wants him.

…Take me with you, I wanna be a Hollywood star!