FoxTrot Classics by Bill Amend for November 27, 2021

Sheesh.

Don’t tell me that you have forgotten the rest, Jason? Can’t you calculate it from first principles?

So irrational.

Won’t this game ever end?

Referee throws the penalty flag. “Delay of game. Penalty of 2.718281828459045 …. yards.”

1st Announcer: “The downs keepers are coming onto the field with the chains, compass and straight edge.”

2nd Announcer: "The coach is arguing that the mass of the linemen slowed the passage of time on the line of scrimmage and therefore time on the field was different than the time on the time clock.

We take you to New York to our rules expert Dr. Einstein. Al, how do you see it?"

Al: " The refs missed the encroachment penalty due to the quantum entanglement of the defensive linemen, Unfortunately, that’s not reviewable since reviewing the results changes them."

1st Announcer: “Thank you, Al. We’ll be back to the Quantum Physics Bowl, right after these messages or not.”

Did you agree on how many decimal places to carry, first, Jason?

Yumm PI

There’s a reason why we use π …

They have calculated the last digit in PI and it was not Jason who did it.

They’ll get round to it eventually.

Or forget what you started to do.

Marcus is going to get cramps in that position for all eternity

The ball will never be snapped.

Well, at least the first 111 digits are correct. That’s all the farther I memorized. I had to stop there—I’m the third, which 111 looks like, and my birthday is May 13 (513, get it?).

Assuming Jason can continue his recitation, they’re both going to have backaches very soon — hike the ball already!