That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for March 08, 2022

“Isn’t this convenient? I fish in the barrel and then you can clean them right away.”

/// Little Freja insisted on cash

on the barrelhead, selling her stash

to these two fisherfolk

who had smoked themselves broke,

having gotten addicted to hash.

“I will call this board game Monotony.” It never caught on.

Hortense discovered that sometimes feeling board involved more than a dull afternoon!

The Rasmussen family were certain they’d make a fortune with their Competitive Tabletop Smelt-Racing Track, if only they could get the fish to stay in their lanes.

If, by chance, you should wish to retain/

A designer whose tastes are quite plain/

Yet whose vision , artistic,

Is supremely simplistic/

You can do a lot worse than a Dane.///

For example, here we have Anders/

As he deeply and thoughtfully ponders/

The form of a table:

Whose shape must be able

to serve certain hasty absconders..///

It’s assembled with consummate ease/

one barrel, one slab (if you please)/

No Rococo curves/

to jangle the nerves/

Or to get in your way when you flees..///

And you may want to keep in mind/

That all that the coppers will find/

Is one barrel, one board/

(Losses you can afford )/

As you leave them a few miles behind.

/// To the Danes, a cliché best forgotten

was the worn old phrase “something is rotten.”

But for catchers of fish,

if you don’t cook the dish

that same day, it’s a thing misbegotten.

“It says to insert tab z into slot x. I swear if you get another hair brained Ikea like this I’m leaving you.”

Little Abigail took her 3 card monte lessons very seriously.

whelp, she’s got us over a barrel now, ain’t she, ma…?

“I tell you what Maggie……If this Ouija Board can tell me the numbers of this weeks lottery I won’t have to work on your farm no more!”

You call it repurposing and I call it crap. This “barrel table” it not going in my dining room!

“Let’s put the outhouse next to the rose bush to mask the smell, I don’t like the smell of roses.”

Slicking the skittles board before the chumps arrive.

Baby needs new shoes.

Farming’s always been a bit dicey.

As little Scarlett’s parents divvied up the fried ants for lunch, she swore for the first time to never be hungry again.

Greta practiced her blackjack dealing with Grandpa. He now owed her 2,000 kroner and was betting the farm on the next hand. She had him over a barrel.

How do you like this IKEA table for our dining room?

Le’ go ! You bought it for ME !

Mama, papa, I thought the playdoh was for me?

“Here’s all the money I got for my milk today…I think the Queen is that card in the middle”

“Sorry, wife. Looks like you and the kid don’t eat again today.”

Mom and Dad Malone teaching their daughter, Molly, the trade. (Now all she needs is a wheelbarrow.)

Her chances are stunningly small/

(In truth, there is no chance at all)/

But if Greta should chance/

to be found at a dance/

It won’t be her debutante ball.

Zorro’s been here!!!!!!!!!! :)

Just a little bit longer Missy. We’re almost done planning out your snipe hunt.