That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for March 29, 2022

Charles spent the afternoon with the ladies; Harold tried to figure out how to get the grass stains out of the seats of his pants.

Discussion about weather Smith should lose his medal.

Robert made a tactical error. He had sat down next to Sally, as she was all by lonesome and appeared like an easy target to chat up, but it turns out she actually wanted to watch the match! And meanwhile Roger flirted with Mary and Lucy.

Roger was a master of mansplaining, and Robert could only look on with awe.

Lawn tennis is great, but our set is all switching to Pickleball!

/// Not much tennis at this Tennis Party.

It’s their laugh, not their sport, which is hearty.

Dennis toyed with his racket.

Hit the ball? Couldn’t hack it.

But two girls (and one guy) think he’s “arty.”

/// So they lounge in the shade of a tree.

Dennis riffs to dispel their ennui.

Haven’t played a set yet,

never once broke a sweat.

He just hones his high-flown repartee.

Although it is dreadfully hot/Their frocks are devoid of a spot/And the lads, in their blazers/Are sharper than razors../And I’d like to murder the lot.///

I’m livin’ down ‘ere near the bog/An’ I works every day like a dog/For a bugger wot’s ruthless/An’ that lot’s as useless/As tits on a bloody boar hog..///

But while they was havin’ their larks/Sittin’ ‘round makin’ clever remarks/Drinkin’ pink lemonade/In the green court side shade/I been readin’ my Hegel an’ Marx…

“So, what kinda’ racquet are you gals into?”

A courting he will go.

“Sally has a nice little stool to sit on, I using an umbrella.”

chip wished that he had biff’s smooth ways. he really admired how biff could attract the racy women who’d expose their wrists every now and then…

Joe was not happy when he heard Frank suggesting to the ladies a little Canadian doubles.

chris rock, will smith back hand??

Please ladies, a little slower so I can take mental notes, because, let’s face it, that’s a lot of dress. What’s the first step in taking it off of you again?

So tell me ladies, wouldn’t you like to get out of those hot long dresses?

“Turnaround time? What’s that?” sez Steve Melcher.

Both ladies claimed to be adept ball handlers.

While Fiona and Millicent were enthralled with Trevor’s racquet, Freddie was more interested in his balls.

While Leslie explained the fine points of the passing shot, Charlotte and Muffy were checking out Nelson’s man spread.

Freddy’s true partner, Thomas, delighted in the ladies’ promises of lewd acts if only Freddy would choose one of them as his Mixed Doubles Partner.

Lads and lassies had little to do/In those days, entertainments were few/so dressed up to their necks,/they sat wishing for sex/While around them, the tennis balls flew.

Though both girls wore a tennis-white frock,

their confession to James was a shock:

the ladies were admittin’

that they’d hoped for badminton

as they both had a preference to shuttlecock.

A definite case of man- spreading ( I hope she will notice )

The Tennis Party: 

Paste 

commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Charles_March_Gere_-_The_Tennis_Party.jpg 

in your browser address bar for info and links that point to more info about this painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #2903 (March 29, 2022) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there (awaiting Mr. Melcher’s approval) pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. First work by him used here.

How dreadful, old time tennis, double fault!

Nice take on the Oscar slap.

My trouble with tennis is the strange biophysical effects I have on the racket. I alternately magnetize the wood so that the ball is attracted to it, or I cause the strings to disappear into another reality as soon as the ball reaches them, only to reappear once it has gone through.