The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for July 31, 2022

He prefers the Reynolds.

That’s a wrap…

Thereby blowing your chance to become the world’s first wrap artist.

Try it on some lower level officials and lesser slaves and we’ll check it out in a few years.

You should hear Saran when the DJ starts, he can really…rap!

It’s still better to be wrapped in that new newfangled Saran Wrap than with T.P.

It was transparent he was just in it for the money. Later he peddled it as evening wear for the cocubines during harem dances. Rejected for leaving nothing to the imagination.

Forget it Saran, let’s just wrap up this job!

“Besides, it really only sticks to itself!”

Saran then decided to go to work at a weight loss clinic.

It got even better when a certain boy came up with Tut-perware.

Don’t wrap it….bag it.

his plans were foiled again

He told me he prefers this, be-gauze its cooler.

What could have inspired the Egyptians to mummify their leaders?

The trick to using “Cling Wrap” is to wet your fingers first. I’m guessing it would work on “Saran Wrap” as well.

I hear wrap music.

Saran Wrap is a pain because it always sticks to itself.

A man came into his psychiatrist’s office dressed only in Saran Wrap. The psychiatrist says, “I can see you’re nuts.”

I hope he patented it

Well, this case is all Wrap-ped up.

He just wanted to be clear on this.

Cut! Okay, that’s a wrap.

This is mummifying

Another good one, Scott!

Seal a Meal would have made a fortune back then!

looking at the hieroglyphics, looks like Toyota, VW, McDonalds, Twitter,Mercedes, Nike, and Apple were all around back then.

He was going to use aluminum but he was foiled

There’s so much wrong with the mummifying here, the wearing of the headdress on the cadaver for one. But it made me laugh anyway ;-)

we’ve learned much about those ancient practices, but have yet to discover how a twinkie can be so well-preserved even after 50 years…

If the material is not clean and flexible, he might get a tapeworm!