F Minus by Tony Carrillo for March 15, 2023

Made with 100% organic crickets!

Finally, honesty in packaging.

Meaning it’s fatal, maybe have a salad instead

Fair enough. What does it taste like?

Perhaps we should just microwave it.

Written by AI.

Can cause nonexistence? Does that mean it can make you disappear?

In certain amounts? Does that mean they can’t reveal it because of the magician’s code?

Schrödinger’s Food Company.

In English: it’ll kill you

tofu

Yep. Stay away from highly processed food.

Finally, a good way to significantly reduce the human population.

Artificial taste-flavored eating substance.

Big food selling to big people.

Would it kill ya to just try a little? Apparently!

“Sometime Fatal Events May Occur”

It’d be easier to identify the packages that DIDN’T belong on.

As long as it doesn’t cause d*****a

Hon, can you get “DRINK” from the fridge?

The “Impossibility Burger”?

Not just death, but “Nonexistence”, explosive or worse?