Frank and Ernest by Thaves for March 22, 2023

You can’t get blood from a turnip, but then you can’t get it from carrots or tomatoes, either, and they have no use for blood. The joke would be better if they were in human form and carrying blood donation equipment.

They’ll be able to root him out.

The one after that is a dead beet.

a phlebotomist’s worst nightmare

I could of had a " V-8 "…

Obviously trying to beet his payment.

He’ll just put his head in the sand.

Why does he carrot all?

oh you can’t beet this one

Isn’t broc-coli a disease? If not, it should be…

When in Rome, do as the romaines do.

Help, don’t get it :( …

Two carrots were walking downtown, deep in animated conversation and not paying careful attention to where they were going. They stepped into the street and were struck by a bus driven by a cabbage. The husband was closer to the bus and much more seriously injured. When his wife saw the tomato and zucchini who loaded him into the ambulance shaking their heads, she became even more worried. The police officer, a squash, who put her in his squad car and followed the ambulance to the hospital, tried to reassure her, but she was distraught. And, indeed, with some justification. At the ER, the doctor, a cucumber, gave her the bad news: “Ma’m, your husband will live, but I’m sorry to have to tell you that for the rest of his life he’ll be a vegetable.”

“I’ve got to take a Leek.”

“Yeah, he’s after the Turnip…”

( ͡ ﹏ʖ ͡  )

What a bunch of saps.

They tried collecting from the sweet potato but found out it was a yam…he was a debt ringer.

You won’t be able to get blood, but you should be able to get some lettuce.

too late… but you can still get some Turnip Soup at the Frank and Ernest Deli….!

Let’s hope the turnip isn’t stoned.

Do you carrot all that the ‘hair’ is on the wrong end?

…says the fruit.

What’s the joke?

Probably funnier, IMO, if the briefcase said “Blood Drive.”