Close to Home by John McPherson for May 26, 2023

heck, i could swear people started using these things in the first place just to avoid that!

Another step backwards in technology

The company would never do that. The first person that cut their finger would sue the company for everything they have.

You can also dogear your smartphone or tablet.

Trivial Factoid:

The longest place name in the United States is possibly a lake in Massachusetts called Lake Chargoggagoggmanchauggauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg (49 letters, or 53, if you count the Lake portion). It is also sometimes called Webster Lake.

Note: That word is so weird, that we’ve got nuthin’…so you’re pretty much on your own! Feelin’ lucky?

— Your friends at Autocorrect

I prefer a real book. Staring at a lighted screen reading words can’t be healthy. Not to mention the radiation those things give out. Besides you can throw a book away if you don’t like it, it can make a good doorstop and a loaded book shelf looks nice. Reading words on paper is better for our health.

Bloody ’ell, what will they think of next.

Reminds me of movies that throw in foul language and other garbage “for more realism.” Pffft, I’m watching a movie, I don’t want that kind of real.

GOOD ONE!!

They wouldn’t be able to sue if the product stated it had a feature to simulate paper cuts. You are then paying for the option.

why would anyone want that.

Very funny! Thanks, John.

How come nobody ever sued some poor book company for paper cuts. I mean really, paper is a known hazard. Shouldn’t someone in California be addressing this to the supreme court? I mean really. Where is the justice for the poor victims of this ongoing threat to the health and happiness of the entire human race. If Micky Rooney were here we could put on a show and march to city hall, or something. …sigh. Never mind.

Could they also make one of the corners seem dog-eared?

And in the next version, I hear, you can fold down the upper-right corner to mark your place.

With A book, you never need to worry about a battery.

…and for vintage books, kindle will emit an old musty mildewey smell

Thanks John, funny and way, way, out of the box, clever…

Fortunately that’s just an option that you can choose to use, it’s there for the masochists.

Those intelligent devices really smart.

What about a highlighter that I can constantly lose?

Eventually technology will become so compact, that you’ll actually be able to shave with your RAZR, it’ll be so thin.

Who would knowingly activate it?

I think they have a bigger issue: the Kindle appears to emit some sort of radiation that affects the hand holding it.