Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for November 01, 2023

She’s clearly very attractive, yet polarizing.

I was in the study with Colonel Mustard. I was holding a rope. He was carrying a lead pipe. How did we get there? I haven’t a clue!

I was over the border at Taco Bell.

Another masterpiece. Seriously, picture this 10 feet tall hanging on a wall. And I’m not trying to distract from the missing Tomatillos.

Sitting in a corner eating tomatillos. Where else would I be?

Where were YOU when the big bag of steaming hot bull silt went missing?

I confess! I took it and tossed it away! The things have taken over the garden. You want tomatillos, I’ll give you sacks of them. Tomatillos are at my windows, pushing in the doors, coming down the chimney. Good Lord, they have joined forces with the zucchini!

I was a thousand miles away, wishing I had some tomatillos.

By the way, what was in the box? Magnespheres?

http://larryspringmuseum.Org/discoveries

…is the lady…

…(I’ll call her,Lady Jane)…

…is Lady Jane wearing dungarees?…

…perhaps not…

…but…

…[side bar Simpson’s joke: …

…but but but…

…make him stop!]…

…I believe the bag of tamatillos was stolen by the librarian, April Showers…

…who would name their daughter, April Showers…

…well…

…I supposed if your last name is, Showers, that you are stuck with that…

…and maybe April has sisters named, June or May, maybe even January…

…true story…

…I once knew a girl named, December…

…and her twin sister was named, Christmas …

…well knew is a misnomer…

…cuz I didn’t know her…

…er…them…

…I met them at the Twin Festival in Twinsburg…

…and never saw them again…

…I was drawn to them like a magnet…

…and then repelled like green beret from a helicopter…

…opps…

…my understatement was overstood…

…it’s a word rapping hood…

In the kitchen making salsa, ¿Por qué quieres saber?

for the record, I don’t have the tomatillos.

In the other isle buying green hot chilies!!!

Pooping. Check the surveillance footage from the third floor employee’s bathrooms if you don’t believe me.

With the butler. He did it.

Not kidding, I just bought some tomatillos yesterday. I usually have to tell the clerk at the checkout what they are.

I miss rubber stamping the date. sigh

This time Superman will change into Kent ucky ready or not. Red militant trunks not speedos. Oh the sin on his momma’s soul.

Tequila

15283? Could be 45283?

My armadillo was playing the the picadillo. The audience was rapt. I was trapped.

I’ve eaten the evidence….

Making salsa. Why do you ask?

The evidence is in but don’t hold yer breath.

I never touched your bag … or tomatillos!

Seriously folks — that is one fine looking hat.

Uh, I was watching the fashion model. She was groping her friend, the other fashion model. It was her trick to divert attention to herself—very reliable. And I don’t know anything about, you know, this bag of tomatillos, and how they got in my locker.

behind the past

April 22, 1977 was a Friday …!

( bonus: you can use your old 1977 calendar in 2033 )

Guilty as charged.

Do I need a lawyer?

I’d like to speak to a lawyer please.

Sadly, I was making salsa.

I was here

Yeah, well, what can I say? It was quite the party last night. I tied one on, and ended up with the nightshade on my head and everything. I have no regrets.

I’m still trying to figure out what a tomatllio is.

I know nothing about a missing bag of tomatillos! I never touch the buggers. Tomatoes are my poison!

I am intrigued, instead, by the nearly buried (unfortunately, not quite) bad pun, “magnet draws crowds”; they must have been rather Ferrous Folk (Bueller? Bueller?)….

The Jell-o recipe picture in the Blog reminds me of the old song “Lime Jello Marshmallow Cottage Cheese Surprise”.