Pickles by Brian Crane for June 28, 2024

I couldn’t put up with Opal.

meh⠄⠄⠄a win’s a win

Nothing wrong with that.

When you get to a certain age, it happens, I remember my parents doing that, and now I do the same thing, check the obits first!

The preservatives in those cookies are helping him to win!

Who coined the expression ‘lazy recliner’, it is just a object to sit on. Objects don’t have emotions!

We now pause for 20 minutes while Opal retreats to the kitchen to do her ‘Zinnnnnnng!’ dance. She’s accompanied by the music of Bootsy Collins’ Rubber Band, playing ‘Stretching Out’.

Sounds like a good life to me.

She has more crumbs on her then he does.

He should have asked “So, what’s your point”

A 75 year old man has a life expectancy of 11 additional years, women 14 years. Based on Nelson / Sylvia’s age they should be no more than 70. They have always been drawn as 70 year olds in 1964 (when 70 was really old) not 2024-big difference.

With La-Z-Boy recliners, the lever is on the opposite side, and pointing back is reclined. I know it’s a small detail, but for some reason this bugs me.

If you bet someone you’re going to outlive them, and you win, how do you collect?

I would do that. Only problem with it Mrs won’t let me have a La Z Boy. (It’s her house, I just live there!) :/

My! Isn’t Opal the witty one! Just remember that every nit you pick is a reflection of your taste in men.

I can think of only one better way to go…….

Obituaries, then comics. Delayed gratification.

She’s not wrong. Have you heard of a plate, old man?

And she discovered him, just that way. Stiff as a board…cookie halfway in mouth….

Even better!

That’s what you call a “winning strategy”.

“I Am Legend.”

Standing, sitting, lying down, rolling over … … it’s all good.

Ahh, the next, “Secret to Long Life,” scam.

Cookie crumbs as tontine.

because Opal makes the crummiest cookies

At least Earl is on the right side of the grass, Opal!

That works too.

What kind of cookies?

Well, according to M.A.S.H. I’m front-runner for the tontine.

still better than the alternative!

Our La-Z-Boy furniture we ordered in mid-January is being delivered on Tuesday! Can’t wait!

“Last man…..” from Opal; Works for me.

Since I am not in touch with any of my former classmates or co-workers, I always check the obits daily.

LA-Z-BOY.

Got it.

(Easy-boy. Lai-zee-boi, boiled alive)

She says that, like it’s a bad thing.

He’s still alive, isn’t he?

She makes that sound like a bad thing.

ₐₖₐ a victory celebration

The important thing is he has a positive altitude (sic) and they don’t. :)