Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for October 02, 2024

Tasteful humor!

Are raccoons anything like opossums? They have pretty strong poison resistance…

That’s like the dog poop recognition joke.

Strange. Now it feels like it’s been poisoned, too.

A-yup. I reckon some raccotty-coons jest ain’t so smart as tothers. He were a nice un, though….

The juice has not been poisoned.

BUT YOUR MIND HAS.

It is good that I am immune to poison.

…nah…

…it’s just diet Mountain Dew…

…there’s lead in the water at work…

…safe amounts according to government standards mind you…

…so they decided to give us free sodas…

…so they could also give us free water…

…but if it’s deemed safe…

…I’m using my reusable water bottle and filling up at the fountain…

…all those plastic bottles are just as bad? …

…if not worse…

…right?…

…besides….

…around ten years ago…

…we came home from a weekend away…

…with water pouring out of our front yard…

…it seems our waterline broke away from the water main by the street….

…they dug it up to replace it…

…you guessed it…

…our old waterline was lead…

Unlike some careless people, raccoons tend to wash their food before eating. “An apple a day keeps the doctor away … but not if you forget to wash it!”

Hey . . . what happened to my screwdriver?

Life in the super slow lane.

But it looked like Tang!

I thought animals were smart

raccoon is a buffoon

Sniff + Slurp + Oops = Comics Gold

( it’s not just a scratch )

Lyle Lovett on the ear drum.

Poison is F69 on The Club Jukebox.

The Monopoly Green House poison effect.

Do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars, go directly to Saint Teresa Lady of Lame Morlametuary & Plumage Parlor.

Sad but true. Works on some humans too.

Ya know, the more I look, the more I wonder if it’s really a raccoon, or just a drawing. But then I thought, if it was a real raccoon I could probably smell it.

Gotta run you over to Cider-Cyanide Hospital!!

That moment when your life changes. And then it seeps on out.

Code Blue Code Blue

Daniel Boone and Davey Crockett Head’s Up..

Cranky Crane Shaft Boot Up!

Fourth frame: SLAM (showing the raccoon having fallen nose down )