Then we find out that the female angel is actually a defunked Skipper Doll. Baby sister to Barbie. So that would make the giraffe about a foot tall. I think I could Pass the Bar in this Exam!
One of my problems with the whole “heaven” thing is that the entry specifications seem so wildly different depending on who you talk to. Not to mention procrustean.
Next time you’re out and about (especially if you’re in a church, synagogue, or mosque), take a good look around and ask yourself, “If all these people got into Heaven, would it really be Heaven?” And, don’t get me started on the whole Eternity thing …
No worries, heaven and hell are both made up constructs to scare the gullible and control the fearful.
Far too many people are so scared of death (or perhaps it’s life they fear) that they have to make up a “life after death” as something to look forward too. As I read some time back — “What happens to a person after death? Same as happens to a mosquito after swatting.”
Why would anyone admit to being so ignorant as to believe in any of that malarkey about heaven or hell or gods or devils or that worship a device of agonizing torture as a symbol for their religion. Such death cults are an abomination and deserve to be mocked for the foolishness that they are.
I hope that no one will be disappointed to hear that (in utter frustration) I have given up on posting in this thread. I can find no way to maintain context—-it’s beyond my intellectual capabilities. The only consolation I can find is that I can still recognize when it is time to stop.
eastern.woods.metal about 4 years ago
I know one guy who’s going to have trouble getting in
I Mad Am I about 4 years ago
Then we find out that the female angel is actually a defunked Skipper Doll. Baby sister to Barbie. So that would make the giraffe about a foot tall. I think I could Pass the Bar in this Exam!
sirbadger about 4 years ago
When it’s your shift, you will also need to adjust the chair.
wameen about 4 years ago
Can’t wait for St. titansaur Argentinosaurus huiculensis’ shift.
Concretionist about 4 years ago
One of my problems with the whole “heaven” thing is that the entry specifications seem so wildly different depending on who you talk to. Not to mention procrustean.
Gent about 4 years ago
Heh. Raise the bar all you want, Giraffe. I’m on a highway to hell anyway.
finkd about 4 years ago
Kinda sticking your neck out on this one, aren’t you ?
Lady loves a joke about 4 years ago
Wait until the boss man upstairs hears about this!
The_Uncle about 4 years ago
Hmmmm… I’m just curious as to how the giraffe is managing to wield the Holy Quill minus opposable thumbs. (??)
Enter.Name.Here about 4 years ago
I didn’t know Heaven had thrill rides….Except for the brief one that goes down to the BAD place.
sandpiper about 4 years ago
I’ll wait to decide after I’ve heard a few first hand reports.
Jimmyk939 about 4 years ago
That’s just for the giraffe hunters…karma, don’t you know
vaughnrl2003 Premium Member about 4 years ago
Calm down folks, that’s not heavens gate, it’s just the door to the dessert lounge.
Linguist about 4 years ago
Trying to meet the height requirements of a giraffe to get into heaven? That’s quite a stretch!
ChessPirate about 4 years ago
Well, you know what they say, “all giraffes go to Heaven…” ☺
BRBurns1960 about 4 years ago
Poor baby giraffes.
mistercatworks about 4 years ago
OK, how tall do you have to be to get kicked out?
SavannahJim Premium Member about 4 years ago
This may be the most concise explanation of organized religion I’ve ever read.
DondiDoo about 4 years ago
On my shift, you must be this intelligent to get in.
Honorable Mention In The Banjo Toss Premium Member about 4 years ago
If Randy Newman had known this, there would have been one more verse in “Short People.”
JenSolo02 about 4 years ago
Well, that leaves me and my 5’2” osteoporosis shrinking frame out…
DCBakerEsq about 4 years ago
Next time you’re out and about (especially if you’re in a church, synagogue, or mosque), take a good look around and ask yourself, “If all these people got into Heaven, would it really be Heaven?” And, don’t get me started on the whole Eternity thing …
the lost wizard about 4 years ago
Aka The NBA draft.
sml7291 Premium Member about 4 years ago
No worries, heaven and hell are both made up constructs to scare the gullible and control the fearful.
Far too many people are so scared of death (or perhaps it’s life they fear) that they have to make up a “life after death” as something to look forward too. As I read some time back — “What happens to a person after death? Same as happens to a mosquito after swatting.”
Why would anyone admit to being so ignorant as to believe in any of that malarkey about heaven or hell or gods or devils or that worship a device of agonizing torture as a symbol for their religion. Such death cults are an abomination and deserve to be mocked for the foolishness that they are.
LeslieAnn Premium Member about 4 years ago
Love the giraffe’s halo.
keenanthelibrarian about 4 years ago
Anything’s possible with God (so they tell me) …
john about 4 years ago
I hope that no one will be disappointed to hear that (in utter frustration) I have given up on posting in this thread. I can find no way to maintain context—-it’s beyond my intellectual capabilities. The only consolation I can find is that I can still recognize when it is time to stop.
WDD about 4 years ago
Yup, Tall Clubs International