Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson for August 06, 2015
August 05, 2015
August 07, 2015
Transcript:
Calvin: "I have a hammer!"
Calvin: "I can put things together! I can knock things apart! I can alter my environment at will and make an incredible din all the while!"
Calvin: "Ah. It's great to be male!"
Too bad that most of the males seem to revel in pointless loud stupidity like “boom-cars.” Every spring and summer I get my eardrums assaulted by insanely loud bass coming out of cars. It never seems to occur to these males that only other males like that absurdly loud noise.
Ah, but the venue where being male is at its best is at those obnoxiously loud “music” festivals, specifically when utilizing their port-a-pots. These days, port-a-pots are quite possibly the only remaining place where it’s still great to be male.
@Bilan—-A few tomorrows later he will be asking where his hearing aid is. My age 50 stepson has found out what cranked up music does to your hearing—play now (loud), pay later (hearing loss).
I like loud booms….loud is exciting….the thrill of fireworks and loud sirens from fire engines and police cars. Love parades and things that go BOOM! Loud music from a car is annoying only because it’s not my music. I’m in my sixties, but when I get to hear a loud “controlled” explosion it brings a smile to my face and I feel like a child!!
I was trying to see if I could get everything Calvin was saying in the second panel to go with the rhythm and tune of “If I Had a Hammer” by Peter, Paul, and Mary. LOL. The first three lines worked, but not I couldn’t get the last one to quite go along.
Six more retirement checks and my odometer will turn “80”. That said, my mailbox is plagued with hearing aid ads 4 days a week (or more).. I can still hear a mouse pee in my sock drawer even after years of flailing a Fender Strat nights to make ends meet. Even with 8 years of ‘Military Stuff’, I protected my hearing with cigarette filters or SOMETHING,so I didn’t have to wind up like my WWII friends, cousins and neighbors going ‘deef’..
It’s great to be male. I’m writing a fictitious book called, “101 Reasons I’m Glad I’m Not a Girl.” Number one on the list is being able to pee standing up – the world is your urinal. Number 101 is not having to find a bag to match my shoes.
In between are 99 serious and not-so-serious reasons. Whenever I hear someone mention a “woman’s issue” be it sociological, psychological or physiological – serious or frivolous, I’ll blurt out “Reason number 76” or some other number. Those in the know about the book (mostly my wife and my sister) get the message that I do sympathize with them.
I am glad that about half the people on the planet are women. They make life interesting however, I’m glad I’m not one of them. It’s a lot easier being a guy.
Actually, I think I’m pushing nearly 1,000 reasons by now.
If I had a Hammer, and I had a Sickle… old USSR version.-Booming, Subwoofer music: At intersections I can feel the pavement vibrate as the offenders wait out the red light. Oh well, it’s just a different kind of fire hydrant for marking territory.
This remind me to the first scene of Stanley Kubrick’s “2001 A Space Odyssey” but also at another first scene of Mel Brook’s “History of The World,part1”
BE THIS GUY about 9 years ago
And it’s ok if you belch.
Susie Derkins :D about 9 years ago
Can we fix it? No we can’t!
TMO1 Premium Member about 9 years ago
Too bad that most of the males seem to revel in pointless loud stupidity like “boom-cars.” Every spring and summer I get my eardrums assaulted by insanely loud bass coming out of cars. It never seems to occur to these males that only other males like that absurdly loud noise.
Linux0s about 9 years ago
I don’t think that’s how the song goes.
Bilan about 9 years ago
Tomorrow, he’ll be singing If I had a rocket launcher …
Alexander the Good Enough about 9 years ago
Ah, but the venue where being male is at its best is at those obnoxiously loud “music” festivals, specifically when utilizing their port-a-pots. These days, port-a-pots are quite possibly the only remaining place where it’s still great to be male.
charliefarmrhere about 9 years ago
@Bilan—-A few tomorrows later he will be asking where his hearing aid is. My age 50 stepson has found out what cranked up music does to your hearing—play now (loud), pay later (hearing loss).
deojaideep aka Courage about 9 years ago
Calvin Thor!
phylum about 9 years ago
imagine…calvin giving an endorsement for hillary way back then….
SusanSunshine Premium Member about 9 years ago
Hey!
I have a hammer!And I love being female!
Kristiaan about 9 years ago
It is!
dustspecks Premium Member about 9 years ago
If Calvin had a hammer, he’d hammer in the morning….he’d hammer in the evening…..all over this land……..uh, scary.
Plods with ...™ about 9 years ago
OK ’fess up. Who gave it to him?
Pocosdad about 9 years ago
Give a man a hammer, and everything starts to look like a nail.
Egrayjames about 9 years ago
I like loud booms….loud is exciting….the thrill of fireworks and loud sirens from fire engines and police cars. Love parades and things that go BOOM! Loud music from a car is annoying only because it’s not my music. I’m in my sixties, but when I get to hear a loud “controlled” explosion it brings a smile to my face and I feel like a child!!
rentier about 9 years ago
It’s great to be male, when you are female men adore you, that has silver lining, too!
bookworm0812 about 9 years ago
I was trying to see if I could get everything Calvin was saying in the second panel to go with the rhythm and tune of “If I Had a Hammer” by Peter, Paul, and Mary. LOL. The first three lines worked, but not I couldn’t get the last one to quite go along.
ddewrell about 9 years ago
Missing Hobbes
Thomas Scott Roberts creator about 9 years ago
Will he hammer in the morning?Will he hammer in the evening?All over this land?
Dour Scotsman about 9 years ago
Did Susie never get given a hammer?
zeeny about 9 years ago
I am not able to use the calender to traverse back to the previous days…any one else facing the same??
jrankin1959 about 9 years ago
That’s your cue, Miss Derkins…
Hobbes Premium Member about 9 years ago
The last panel shows a side view of Calvin’s mouth. He looks like a Muppet.
Hobbes Premium Member about 9 years ago
@ddewrell: Hobbes is keeping his distance today. It isn’t wise to pounce on a guy who is holding a hammer.
gklassen about 9 years ago
Move over Tim the Toolman Taylor
morningglory73 Premium Member about 9 years ago
I’d rather be a hammer than a nail.
Poollady1 about 9 years ago
Hey! Females can do the same things with a hammer!!!
unca jim about 9 years ago
Six more retirement checks and my odometer will turn “80”. That said, my mailbox is plagued with hearing aid ads 4 days a week (or more).. I can still hear a mouse pee in my sock drawer even after years of flailing a Fender Strat nights to make ends meet. Even with 8 years of ‘Military Stuff’, I protected my hearing with cigarette filters or SOMETHING,so I didn’t have to wind up like my WWII friends, cousins and neighbors going ‘deef’..
dflak about 9 years ago
It’s great to be male. I’m writing a fictitious book called, “101 Reasons I’m Glad I’m Not a Girl.” Number one on the list is being able to pee standing up – the world is your urinal. Number 101 is not having to find a bag to match my shoes.
In between are 99 serious and not-so-serious reasons. Whenever I hear someone mention a “woman’s issue” be it sociological, psychological or physiological – serious or frivolous, I’ll blurt out “Reason number 76” or some other number. Those in the know about the book (mostly my wife and my sister) get the message that I do sympathize with them.
I am glad that about half the people on the planet are women. They make life interesting however, I’m glad I’m not one of them. It’s a lot easier being a guy.
Actually, I think I’m pushing nearly 1,000 reasons by now.
jshill922 about 9 years ago
Jeff0811, Exactly! I will never ever understand why some people think that everyone with a 2-3 block radius wants to listen to their “music”.
rentier about 9 years ago
She’ll knock Calvin!!
cubswin2016 about 9 years ago
Another thing you can do with a hammer is fall and hit yourself in the head. Be careful, Calvin.
Number Three about 9 years ago
“I have a hammer and I’m not afraid to use it!”
xxx
pouncingtiger about 9 years ago
A slight tribute to Pete Seeger
spaced man spliff about 9 years ago
If I had a Hammer, and I had a Sickle… old USSR version.-Booming, Subwoofer music: At intersections I can feel the pavement vibrate as the offenders wait out the red light. Oh well, it’s just a different kind of fire hydrant for marking territory.
bmonk about 9 years ago
Now everything looks like a nail to Calvin. If he gets a wrench, everything will look nuts!
Hobbes Premium Member about 9 years ago
@LeadingEdge: Maybe Bruce Jenner is tired of hammering?
Renatus Profuturus Frigeridus Premium Member about 9 years ago
This remind me to the first scene of Stanley Kubrick’s “2001 A Space Odyssey” but also at another first scene of Mel Brook’s “History of The World,part1”
Renatus Profuturus Frigeridus Premium Member about 9 years ago
I beg your pardon:I meant Mel Brooks’
neverenoughgold about 9 years ago
Wow, 80 comments already and it isn’t even 8:00PM CDT! Today’s Calvin must have hit a nerve…
…with a hammer!
larryrhoades about 9 years ago
Great cartoon!(Calvin, the best is yet to come.)
starfighter441 about 9 years ago
If you can’t fix it with a hammer, it’s an electrical problem.
lindz.coop Premium Member about 9 years ago
And when you get older you can stink up the place with a poorly maintained diesel truck.
tea62 about 9 years ago
Oh, now I see! Calvin is actually Donald Trump.
Humerus1 3 months ago
tru dat Calvin