Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for September 11, 2018

Wait a few days, and it’ll be sturdier than any of those stones!

Gr8! Do you frame it or stuff it?

Whoa! for a minute there I thought I was in B.C.

And the age old question that has confounded man has been answered. The bagel came first then the wheel.

Now if someone would invent coffee we could take a break.

No sense reinventing the Bagel…

Unfortunately, greasing the axle with cream cheese didn’t work so well.

“A Bagel is a Doughnut that’s been dipped in cement!”

Now he has to invent cream cheese and lox.

As well you might!

If all the legends about bagel durability were true, we would be finding bagel artifacts in every dig.

When the birds fly over the harbor, they are bagels. When they are over the ocean, they are Segals.

He’s also invented the Chase logo on the left.

What’s a bagel?

Now he only has to invent cream cheese. But milking those mammoths won’t be easy.

Next he invented the car, but people kept eating the wheels.

Okay, I surrender. I read this on an empty stomach. NowI’m heading to the store for bagels and cream cheese.

The only time I ever eat bagels and cream cheese is when I stay at a motel that offers a free continental breakfast in the morning.

I have a bagel for breakfast three days per week. This is not one of those days. Today is an oatmeal day. Tomorrow will be a bagel day.

Still needs a schmear.

President Trump invented the bagel. He just hasn’t taken credit for it yet.

Never mind the bagel, Ally Oop, let’s get to the bialys,

Now invent cream cheese.

Can fault them cavemen, For after inventing the exagonal, the trapezoidal, the square, and the Aztec Pyramidal wheels, Finally pure inspiration and lunch in the same package! Win-win I’ll say!

He just needs some lox and cream cheese.

I’ll have a nice fresh Salted Wheel, light on the Cream Cheese, Double Lox and a slice of Tomato.

From a comic many years ago, Einstein was writing on the chalkboard stuff like "E=mc, E=Mc^5 (to the fifth power), E=Mc^10, but still couldn’t figure it out. Then the lady that was tidying up his desk said, “Now that desk is squared away, yessir, SQUARRRRRED away!” And then Einstein got the same look the guy trying to invent the wheel had.

Funny, he doesn’t look Jewish…