Pickles by Brian Crane for March 16, 2019

final panel must be Earl reading shampoo or 409 multi-purpose cleaner

My dad always read the “Reader’s Digest” in the bathroom.

That’s what smartphones are for!

Uncle John’s Bathroom Readers. Great books to read anywhere.

Her choice. In that case she wasn’t going to read it.

Trigger words, yeah, that’s the ticket……

Just take the crossword, Earl…

Or Sudoku!

This is the first time she ever saw him going to the reading room with the paper ? Take Opal’s laptop next time ;-)

What does Earl do with that newspaper in the Bathroom?

We keep a handheld solitaire game in the bathroom.

That is what the old Sears catalogs were for! Miss them.

I say just do your business and get out. That ain’t no easy chair!

Books and magazines, EARL!!!

Earl reading the labels – good one. I still do the same, and it’s very – ahem – enlightening. For example, there’s a furniture polish out there that proclaims to the world, “made with real lemon juice.” But the lemonade mixes and so on proclaim just as loudly, “artificially flavored.” So we’re drinking the Gilbert’s chemistry set and spraying the good stuff on the coffee table?

Is that why they call them "bathroom books?:

She won’t touch the paper after Earl has had it in the bathroom?!? How dirty is that bathroom?!? Or… just exactly WHAT is Earl using the newspaper for?!? Nevermind! I don’t want to know!

I used to turn all the bottles on the counter upside down. Having 2 younger sisters, there were always LOTS of bottles. One day, Mom said, “I fixed you!” All the bottles in the bathroom had round tops.

Cell phone

Earl take the paper. She can make her choice later.

The mobile phone like the rest of us.

She must have taken a nasty pill this morning…she’s meaner than usual..

Reading in the can, may bring you the gift of the rhoids.

https://nypost.com/2016/08/25/sorry-to-ruin-your-day-but-reading-on-the-toilet-is-bad-for-you/

Go comics

Finally someone else finds this habit disgusting. No I am not touching that paper when you come out of the bathroom!

My Dad’s favorite expression, as he headed to the bathroom, the newspaper in hand, was: " Anyone wants me, I’ll be in the library. "

Buy a cell phone, you can stay there forever.

With the Internet connection, of course

I’ve actually done this!

When they do invent a time machine, I’m betting it will be a lot like a bathroom. Time inside that room is different than time outside.

I pictured the famous thought experiment with a pair of twins. One is inside the bathroom for fifty years. The other is outside it. You can bet the outside one is going to look a lot older after fifty years.

Why the heck do people need to take stuff into the bathroom to read, anyway? Why can’t they just go in, sit, shit, and pee and then get out? OK, maybe if you’re constipated you’ll be in there a while. Maybe then you’ll want to have something to read. I’ve never taken anything in there to read.

If I were Earl, I’d take Opal’s recipe file box to the bathroom the next time and leave it on the toilet lid.

I read a little more of whatever I have.

I agree with her. I want nothing to do with anything that’s been read in the bathroom.

Shampoo bottle#