Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for October 08, 2019

Are Mr. and Mrs. Pastis having problems?

With Rat around, getting stabbed is a distinct possibility.

He only does that on days he runs a bad pun.

If you drink coffee and use your cell phone at the same time, the which hand rules can change.

I put my coffee on the right, and I hardly ever get stabbed.

Never got stabbed after retirement and I always handled my coffee from the right .

I make sure I cover my ear – spiders may go in!

I always have my cup on the right since I’m right handed.

We never leave any food uneaten. We’re afraid Goldielocks may come n steal it.

Hey now, you can’t put anything past those ghosty-ghosts!

I have a right shoulder and a left shoulder. Do some people also have a front and back shoulder?

Stephan your hair looks a little purple today….. Croc Power !

Don’t be stabbin’ Stephan. We need this strip!

I’ve never heard of either of those superstitions. Did Pastis make them up for this strip, or are there really people who follow them?

Who’s Steph gonna call? GHOSTY BUSTERS!

How has this guy not called pest control?

As I write this I’m doing my usual morning routine, coffee on the left and mousing through GoComics with my right hand.

Off topic, Stephan’s rally cap didn’t work for the Twins last night, oh well, what else is new?

In the corporate world, you must cover, but not your shoulder.

Everyone leads such interesting lives. I try to cover up because I might get cold.

Never hang arms and legs over the edge…yikes!

Actually never thought about it. But I’m right-handed and put my coffee on the right —now that I started looking.

Ever see the Night Gallery episode about the earwig?

My coffee cup, right now, is on my left side so I can use my right hand to scroll through the comics.

A public service announcement from someone who watches reality ghost shows: Ghosty ghosties and things that were never human (shudder) can leave scratches through clothes and heavy bedding. You can try to go back to sleep with those spiders in your bedding.

What is a back shoulder? Is there a front shoulder?

Also Demodex folliculorum, of course. They crawl out of our follicles at night to have sex on our face.

Hey Rat, it’s a habit Pastis acquired when he was a lawyer.

I can recommend a good psychiatrist who can help all y’all with your delusional paranoia.

I have to have a swallow of coffee for each bite of donut. Sometimes it doesn’t work out even…at first.

Don’t split the pole.

Actually, he knows you’ll try to stab him in his sleep, Rat.

My blankets keep the boogey-critters away from me!

I don’t care about my shoulders, but never sleep with your feet off the edge of the bed. Something could reach up and grab you around the ankle.

I sleep on my sides or Sleep Paralysis will come for me. I also never pull sheets over my head because that insinuates that I am dead and people will carry me off into the morgue.

Oh-ho! Cartoon-Boy is superstitious (many Greeks are, is my observation).

Of course, I always try to sit with my back to a wall when I eat/drink out. No back-shooters, ya know? Remember old “Wild Bill” James Butler Hickok….

“Back shoulder”?

My ex-sister-in-law always had to sleep with HER ears covered following a nightmare in which a wolf bit one off. Me? I’m fine. Well . . . maybe except not having legs dangling over the edge of the bed. Then again, doesn’t EVERYone know how unsafe THAT is?

Left shoulder, right shoulder, I’ve only got the two.