Real Life Adventures by Gary Wise and Lance Aldrich for February 27, 2021

Stay wide apart.

The neighborhood barbershop in my childhood had a poster on the wall suggesting different styles of haircut: brush, crew, pompadour, D.A., etc. (It would be many years before I learned that this D.A. did not mean “district attorney”.)

But the hair style I most remember from the poster was the “wide part”. It would be a long time before I learned the word “euphemism”.

Took my elderly, nearly totally bald dad to the barber. Dad ask the barber why he charge the same even though he had little hair. Barber replied, “Finder’s fees.”

Ahhh yes, victorious with the Caesar’s Wreath of Laurel style.

Now a moment of silence for the comb.

Get a razor and get rid of that mess.

We used to have this family friend who was a funny guy and was bald like that, one day his wife who habitually parted her hair on the side decided to part it in the middle, he took one look at her and said, are you copying my hairstyle?

It’s parted like the Red Sea was parted in the book of Exodus.

I tell people I’m wearing a Reverse Mohawk…

That explains the large chair.

But you ARE bald.

Hey, what’s another word for “euphemism”? ;op

A popular line among bald guys is, “Grass doesn’t grow on a busy street.”

No, that’s just bald……

It’s a landing strip for mosquitoes.

Like the Sahara is just a “clearing”.

I had a bald friend who would explain that every male was issued a standard amount of testosterone. He said if I wanted to use mine growing hair, that was my business.

So can I say I’m not fat, I just have very thick skin?

Wide enough to be bald

My hairline essentially matches that of our friend in the cartoon, and I’ve never lost a minute’s sleep worrying about it. I yam what I yam.

I’m trying to remember where, I’ve heard that line before.

I consider it to be thigh burns.