That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for March 15, 2022

Nathaniel Rayban Olds

James was wearing his brand new designer beer goggles.

Google glass prototype (It’s going to take a few centuries to get the kinks worked out)

His wife figured if blinders work on horses, it might keep him from being distracted by the ladies.

/// He wears green-tinted glasses because

not to do so would break several laws.

With them, everything seen

is a beautiful green,

in the Emerald City of Oz.

Originally, poets urged us to view the world through cabbage tinted glasses.

/// Special glasses protected his sight

from the powerful Argland lamp light.

Mr. Olds was concerned

that the whale oil it burned

would cause blindness from burning so bright.

the first Steam Punks were just regular people…

Nathaniel Olds – showing off his prototype for the Oldsmobile headlights.

From the depths of his numerous collars/

On which he spent quite a few dollars/

When he holds his head high/

He may meet your eye/

But nobody hears when he hollers..

“Of course they look Silly. All the successful people look silly. Except for the ones that just act silly. If you can look silly And act silly. Well then you just go into entertainment.”

“Hey kids get your Xray glasses. You can see thru clothes.”

ya think nathaniel looks hep? check out his wife…

https://www.clevelandart.org/art/1991.134.1

He lived in Cleveland; for 8 months of the year this was the only way he could sing, “I see leaves of green….”

wasn’t everything already in 3D ??

The ayes have it.

♪♫♪ Don’t let the peripheral sun get in your eyes♪♫♪

I guess people smoked weed in 1837.

Why “Jeptha Homer” Wade? Did little Jeptha arrive at the schoolhouse for first grade only to find there were two other Jepthas in his class, so the teacher made them all use their full names?

Taking his cue from Superman, Dr Strange figured no one would recognise him with his new glasses.

A visual impairment’s no joke/when you live in a house filled with smoke/he might cure all his ills/With our modern day pills/or perhaps only needed a toke.

“See, look at this. I can totally check that hot girl out and she doesn’t even notice!”

“Or maybe she’s ignoring you because of those dorky glasses.”

Hmmm, 3D glasses?

Jeptha was gradually getting the hang of this Steampunk cosplay thing!

Mr. Wade learned very early on that his experiments with flash daguerrotypes required special protective equipment for his subjects.

George was really disappointed with the toy from his cereal box.

_Maybe these cool shades will divert attention from my eyebrows. I’d just about murder the next person who tells me I got fuzzy caterpillars crawling on my forehead!!!_

Terrific!

I couldn’t tie my damn tie wearing these damn spectacles, so I damn well just wrapped it around my damn neck!

Portrait of Nathaniel Olds: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"File:Portrait_of_Nathaniel_Olds_by_Jeptha_Homer_Wade.jpg" site=commons.wikimedia.org 

(syntax supported by the Google and Yandex search engines) in the address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines, would highly doubt in either case the search causes ads to pop up) for info and links that point to more info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting. Summary inset has strip coloration image. References has a description of the painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #2895 (March 14, 2022) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there (awaiting Mr. Melcher’s approval) pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. First work by this artist used here.

His vision’s strategic – not tactical/

and his “specs” seem a trifle impractical/

And he doesn’t regret/

His petrified pet:/

Not a rock, but a dead “pterodactycal”./

(The extra “ca” is intentional)

Joe Cool, the early days.

What pray, are these ominous masses/That loom o’er Nathaniel‘s glasses ?/When they frown, gloom descends/And trouble portends/For Cleveland’s long-suffering masses…///

He’s a powerful man in these parts/But perhaps he can win peoples hearts:/His accountants demand/that he donate some land/(tax deductible, of course)to the arts…

Inspired by Data’s Sherlock Holmes holodeck program, Geordie decided to do C. Auguste Dupin.

My collar will never poke me in the eyes again.

/// Four green lenses with “Double D” frame

are these eyeglasses technical name.

But their first claim to “fame”

cast their wearers in shame:

as syphlitics whose eyes felt aflame.

(There is an urban legend that tinted lenses in old photographs and paintings mark the wearers as having syphilis. Google images of “syphilis spectacles.”)

/// Patrick Dempsey as Lincoln (pre-beard),

wearing sunglasses looked kinda weird.

They were used to decrypt

the film-script’s tiny script,

(During filming the specs disappeared.)

Why do I keep losing out to the guy with the rose-colored glasses?

Aaaaaayyyyyyy