Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for July 01, 2022

This is a pretty dark version of their “What good is a long life full of broccoli and exercise” routine.

Whether Pig exercises or not should depend on how lean you like your pork.

circular logic…

Here’s the problem. Exercise keeps your body from failing so utterly that you wish you were dead.

Pig without exercise would become the best bacon sold except in California where pigs are required to have room to exercise.

I have never taken any exercise, except sleeping and resting, and I never intend to take any. Exercise is loathsome. And it cannot be any benefit when you are tired; and I was always tired. – Mark Twain

They say that people who exercise and people who eat vegetarian diets live longer.

I wonder if they actually live longer, or if it is that their lives are so miserable that they just seem to be longer.

If my body’s ever found dead on a jogging trail, just know I was murdered elsewhere and dumped there. :-D

Take that, exercise gurus!

I agree with Pig’s philosophy. As Dr Johnson famously said, “Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it passes.”

I exercise so I don’t end up in a nursing home. Dying suddenly at hone would be fine, but I have been in too many nursing homes over the years and watched people waste away. One of the biggest things leading to life in a nursing home is loss of leg strength. I don’t care about looks or competition or any of that, but if keeping my legs strong will keep me out of a nursing home, it’s worth it to me.

If exercising and being a vegetarian for 5 years allowed you to live to be 150, would you do it?

Vicious cycle.

Eat healthy and exercise . . .die anyway . . .nobody gets out alive. It’s all an evil plot.

Then there’s the school of thought that you have a specific number of heart beats before you die and exercise speeds up the heart therefore using them up too quickly.

The sooner you die pig, the quicker you become bacon.

20 minutes a day at 4 MPH on the dreadmill will result in an extra 30 minutes per day of life when I’m old, useless, and mainly in pain. (Maybe I haven’t thought this through)

Pigs only got twelve years anyways.

Exercise and yoga are not for everyone! Yuk

If only there were truth in the phrase “working your a$$ off”.

Pig can see the plus side of almost anything.

I really feel sorry for Goat. What he goes through with friends like those….

I dont mind th excercise, its all the other crap that gets in the way

There are two things I hate – exercise and doctors!

One must be embraced so the other can be, at all costs, avoided. The 45 minutes I spend every day working out is worth the fortune saved by keeping me out of the clutches of the medicos!

I haven’t needed to see a doctor for anything for a couple of years now – and the last time was to only have a cyst removed from my back – and at 77, I intend to keep it that way and the only meds I take will be taking is the occasional aspirin!

Sure but your bacon will be second grade at best. Having " His bacon was mostly fat" is not something you want to leave on your tombstone.

The trick is to do things that are fun and get your body moving. I go to the Y 3 times a week and swim. Swimming is not exercise it is fun.

In this life, you might just have….

Fun fact: being healthy is the longest possible way of dying.

Our hearts have a finite number of beats. I see no point exercising and using them up quicker.

See you there, you, you dirty rat….

Donald Trump never exercises,and look how HE turned out.

I’m on board. Everybody dies; not everyone exercises.

It’s funny as a joke, but sad when people actually believe it. People that don’t take care of themselves spend more time sick and miserable in their short lives than people eating healthy food during a long life.

https://www.gocomics.com/pearlsbeforeswine/2007/11/16

This 90-year-old couple dies in a car accident. St. Peter is showing them around heaven. He shows them the streets of gold, and the man shakes his head. He shows them their mansion, and the man mutters to himself. He shows them the glorious presence of their Savior, and the man shakes his head and mutters again. His wife says, “What are you grousing about?” And the man says, “You and your oat bran … we could have been here 20 years ago!”

I don’t expect to live any longer because I exercise. I think that’s mostly genetics. But I feel better while I’m here!

Pig logic.

Pig does have a point. Bring on the bacon!

Don’t exercise for the health benefit. Exercise so that when you’re on your deathbed, you can think “at least I don’t have to exercise any more!”

What if the time spent exercising take two years of your life, but you only live two years longer?