Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for July 22, 2022

Isn’t THAT Emmett?

“Family?” Are we going to find out what happened to the poor children at long last? (Presuming they weren’t sold into slavery to orcs.)

“My family”? Are they going to admit he has children again?

Family? Are the Thorp kids coming back from China?

P2: A miniature Sputnik spies on the banquet. A weird signal emanates from the craft.

Really awkward use of “son” there, Gil.

Bombshell! Oh, think of the new plot lines coming from Barajas.

OMG — where are Mimi and the kids? Car accident?

P3 In all reality , my family is running the Thorp Family Summer Camp for underprivileged children and couldn’t be here today but they would thank you for giving me this long overdue honor.

Uh oh, do I smell a Dallas/Newhart twist here? The past 8-10 years without the Thorp kids was all a dream?

P4 “But I understand, Jamie and Keri have all-consuming careers in an Asian apparel manufacturing operation that requires long hours and when Mimi isn’t coaching or playing slap *ss with girls on the team, it’s nearly a full time job supervising pool cleanings at the house.”

Yeah, where are the kids, didn’t GilPa coach them.

For that matter, what happened to Tod Andrews, once Gil’s assistant coach of every sport?

Reservation sir? Yes. Thorp, table for one.

Mimi is driving to another state, where she took the softball team for a road game in April and then forgot to bring them back. On her way back to Milford she will buy back the kids from the Oliver Twist Academy, where she dumped then years ago.

Mimi walks in on cue with two Peace Corps Hippi wasetrels.

I still don’t get how the little flashback story and Gil’s mediocre handling of Tays personal problems as well as minimal coaching in a long-ago football game is relevant to this award.

P-1: It only took you 64 years to win coach of the year.

P-2: Gil reads the back of the trophy.

P-3: Ollie’s is having a Christmas in July sale.

Coach of the year and the wife doesn’t even show? I smell a divorce coming.

How is the award nothing without legendary players?

Tays story was so boring, that Mimi and the kids left a long time ago.

What – they couldn’t be there? What – another award? (yawn) Have fun, honey; we’re going shopping…

First I thought, “This is all a dream”, but now I believe “We’re going multiverse”!!!

I’m just curious if this is Coach of the Year for Milford, or Coach of the Year for the Valley Conference, or Coach of the Year for the state of name redacted? And speaking of curious, if you’re curious as to how Mopped Up Thorp handled this, just head straight over to:

I’m predicting Keri has pink hair and a nose ring. And Jami has emo hair covering one eye.

P 1: " ….coach…I’m proud of you….winning ‘coach of the year’ 64 consecutive years…"

Maybe it’s his mother and abusive father missing his greatest moment

I see four chairs at the Thorp table…foreshadowing?

Gil is steamed that he had to pay for four rubber-chicken, year-end banquet meals!