That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for July 26, 2022

“Señor, do not get any ideas about taking the sword without paying me. My son, Inigo Montoya, will track you down and kill you”

This is a nice sword, but I was looking for something more like an AK47

“Bend over.” “Why? I don’t want anything inappropriate – this is a family painting.” “Don’t worry, we’re not riffing on ’Porky’s’, this is a ‘Princes Bride’ joke.”

Carla (formerly Carl) felt that she needed to something to protect her virtue, because she looked just so stunning in her new red dress.

the previous comments foiled my rapier wit and beat me to the Princess Bride references…inconceivable!

“It was owned by a little old lady who used it to kill only on Sundays.”

Pizza cutter? Sir, this is 19th century Scotland, not an anachronism!

/// The realm’s headsman is Testing the Blade,

to determine how well it’s been made.

The Smith, knowing his place,

kneels averting his face.

He’s afraid. “I’ll be paid… or filleted.”

Few things are sharper than this blade and your wit my friend, except, for my pencil! How’s about 10% off for my overtly Gay outfit.

You say to lay my head here? … on this block? … I agree that you shouldn’t buy it without testing it but can’t you consider a less dramatic test?

“A broad sword, you say. Hmmm, I don’t fight many women, do you have a dude sword?”

“Yes Sire….the parents eyes will really pop right of their heads when you use that at the Bris this afternoon.”

The upgraded box cutter was good against Amazon’s larger shipping boxes.

Now I’m going to bash it mercilessly against this pole. Remember, it’s not what your blade does to the pole, but what the pole does to your blade.

Yes, you can make good money selling our knives. But, when you recruit others to sell you make even more from their sales…

You, base pundit, think your pen is mightier than my sword, but my action is about to speak louder than your words.

He’s acquiring a “quality” sword/

And it isn’t because he’s bored -/

He has strong opinions/

And he’s gathering minions- /

He refuses to be ignored !///

He seems to think he’s omniscient/

But if evidence isn’t sufficient/

To convince you he’s right/

He’s willing to fight:/

(Violence can be quite efficient !)///

He lives in a brutal time/

In a cruelly inclement clime../

Thank the good lord that we/

In “the Land of the Free”/

Are not subject to similar slime..(yet)

“I want to see my reflection in my shoes, if you get my drift, shoe shine boy.”

Oh lover, when you said role-play the groveling underling I was expecting whips not a sword, let’s rethink this!

I specifically ordered ostrich skin, not cowhide.

That the pen is mightier than the sword, I’ve always been a proponent, / Over time to overcome any opponent. / But I’m sure you’ll agree / as we often sadly see, / That the sword often speaks louder at any given particular moment.

" Yes, it is indeed a vorpal blade, and I can see myself doing a lot of snicker snacking with it… "

“Yes, this looks like just the thing for the next clown who shows up at my door pushing Brexit.”

Forge something that can open modern packaging, and you’ll make a fortune. I have to use shears now just to get at my cereal.

Do you think this clashes with my red dress?

Testing the Blade: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:McLean Museum and Art Gallery" site=commons.wikimedia.org

(syntax supported by the Google, Yahoo, Bing, DuckDuckgo, Ecosia, and Yandex search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found, and once there find the text string Testing, and click its link for info and links that point to more info about this before 1897 painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #2966 (July 25, 2022) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there pointing to the blog entry with the artist info comment I used to point to here. So far, 4 works by this artist have been used here (5 times, including one repeat). The July 25, 2022 strip has the prior.

I’m sorry, but the chopping block is 50 ducats extra.

“…and so you see, boy, when my opponent has managed to strike a blow, my red robe hides the blood, denying him the satisfaction of seeing me bleed.”

“Ah. And so then your brown leggings….”

Funny!

When my Trekker brother-in-law managed a Pizza Hut, he noticed a resemblance between their cutters and a Klingon batleth.

Are you sure Jim Bowie bought one like this?

man in red: you know where this is going if you don’t repair your mistake with the under armor.

Yes, if you do two more World of Warcraft quests, you will receive that sword as a reward.

But truth be told, we all know you will do 30 quests accomplishing those two.

Oh, I assure you, good sir, that will cut through even the thickest of crust. Just ask any ninja turtle.