Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for January 22, 2023

Some minds need wasting or at least need straightening.

i wish if i can talk to it like that

BUTTERFLIES aren’t butter but they can fly.

You think those are bad? What about double names? Spider monkeys! Tiger sharks! Catfish! Bull sharks! You can’t be both! Then they’ll be, what? Chimeras?

Talking to yourself can be great. At least then you’re talking to someone who understands you and agrees with you. Well … not this time.

Kat, as in Bucky.

You mean cats can’t cat? It’s about time that cats should catsup with the things they can do.

Spells, are all in the spelling. Yip yip yip yip yip

i always lose arguments with myself

But can a Raptor Rap?

I’ve heard of people that are double minded, but actually having two minds is probably not what they meant. Still, two minds working together on a problem could fix many of our troubles facing our world. Good luck with that Wiz and Wiz II.

Been there, done that!

I thought this usually happens when one is trying to sleep.

I talk to myself upon occasion. Sometimes I need an expert opinion…ba da bump bump.

The cat was for the betterment of mankind?

I call this mind-laundering or memory-pimple-popping. Clears the brain cells to consider truly important things, like how to market jalapeno-flavored condoms. “Spice up your love life!” or “Everyone can be ‘hot’ once!”

“Okay, Brain – you don’t like me and I don’t like you. But let’s just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer.”

It’s when you get answers is when you got to worry…

Sometimes talking to myself is the only way too have an intelligent conversation.

Brains. Can’t live with them, can’t live without them.

I spelled “rang” incorrectly in 2nd grade at a spelling bee. Never forget that fact. Did ok in life though. That’s what counts….

Wow wiz has these same thoughts as well? I mean not that I, uh um…..

I used to talk to the dog. She was a great conversationalist – never contradicted me or got offended by my comments. She’s waiting for me at the bridge, sniff.

Mindracing is a pain.

For Charlie Brown, it was the word “maze”. He was thinking of the baseball player, and spelled it “Mays”.

This is so meta

My misspelled word in the spelling bee was “splendid.” Nerves kicked in. Forgot the “n” Sixty years later, still bothers me.

Fish can’t fish.

This is just plain weird….

He’s one breakdown away from getting a TikTok account.

You are Edward Bear, and I claim my £5. (Cottleston, Cottleston, Cottleston Pie.)

Nephew’s gf & I chatted about this..she does it, calls it ‘Self Audit’.

I was told it was okay to talk to myself, just don’t argue!

In German, the joke backfires…. “Fliegen können fliegen und Vögel können ******” …..