Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for February 14, 2023

Good thing Goat only meets Rat in public places.

Punch line

Two-step solution to Door Punch:

1. Don’t answer the door.

2. Call the police.

There was an episode of the Bob Newhart Show where Mr. Carlin hired a guy to hit Bob in the face with a pie.

1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. Why?

Rat’s been Goat’s friend/archenemy for this long and he doesn’t know where Goat lives?

@B uttons (above) had my same thought, so I reply with: 17, Scapegoat Avenue.

I might use that!

Ooh, is that app in the Google Play store? I need it!

I’ve known folks who’s doordash food has been “tasted” prior to arrival

Rat probably uses that Door Punch app frequently.

I have numerous friends that i know where they live and could drive there right now, but don’t know their actual addresses…

That’s not as bad as a “hit man”. I think a smack in the head is an action that Rat loves to do personally. It satisfies his feelings of superiority and aggression. He has a baseball bat handy for that purpose.

Dirty deeds! Done dirt cheap!

lmao

Nothing like a Valentines Day comic involving punching people in the head.

Calling Rat … Asking Rat … Interacting with Rat … is always a risk.

I guess that’s still better than “DoorKickInTheNads.”

Violence is just hilarious.

Doorpunch must do quite a bit of business.

I think the Soprano’s did that. Except Thay punched them with a 45 cal. colt!

So much for dinner…dam-ned that RAT‼️

Just hang up on him, Goat, don’t give him your address if he plans on using “Door Punch” on you.

1-2-1-2 Boogie Boogie Avenue!

A local restaurant advertises Doordash on their sign. For some reason every time I see that I think of “dine and dash”.

Hey, what’s this? I ordered a Hawaiian punch and got a knuckle sandwich.

You gotta reheat…

Now THAT’S an app that there’s a real demand for!

Rat doesn’t know Goat’s address? They visit each other all the time.

last channel should have been "Im going to hang up now " ding dong

DICK CAVETT JOKE

“My uncle couldn’t get into America because of the loyalty oath.

When they asked him if he planned to overthrow the American government by force or violence,he chose violence".

Door Dash-very expensive.

Some friends and I dreamed up this exact business model one day over lunch, except it was “Uber Punch”…

I can think of a few people that I would want to use this on…

I’m gonna guess The Door Punch App was developed by Rat, and that he is user number One.

It should be a huge best seller, too!

Another app for something that shouldn’t have one.