That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for March 13, 2023

The Artist: Hey, it took me 5 years to get all the details right. I also had to replace some of the models that died while I was painting it.

/// In the Tribuna of the Uffizi,

Johann Zoffani captured what we’d see.

Eighty great works of art,

(some complete, some in part).

It’s where tribute and forgery meet. See?

Before Porn Hub

when hoarders are patrons of the arts…

The artist Johann Zoffany

Was fond of a pneumatic fanny

And of the various nude parts

Commonly exposed in “great arts”

But not in normal society —

That would be scandalous impropriety!

And yet his art had approval conferred

By Charlotte and King George the Third.

.

Johann would paint objects scattered around

Paintings, sculptures, diverse things that he found.

His working art studio seemed crazy-busy,

Judging from “The Tribuna of the Uffizi”

A wild frat house in its appearance,

The despair of staid middle class parents

(One could think to see John Belushi

Spewing mashed potatoes and sushi!)

.

I’m surprised Zoffany’s given no credit

By online bloggers or big sites like Reddit

In starting the “Where’s Waldo” craze

Way back in English pre-Regency days.

(Can any of you see where Waldo’s hiding?

I see him amongst it all, but I’m not confiding.)

No, Zoffany was no starving artist,

His shtick was fun and among the smartest.

/// In the Best Picture’s sci-fi conceit,

there’s a “multiverse” where folks repeat.

In one version that lingers,

people have “hot-dog fingers.”

There, Zoffany must paint with his feet.

You really nailed this on, Steve :)

Have to say I’m impressed with so many miniatures of the greats, so small and yet perfectly recognisable, and all done by hand.

Spot the one art piece that doesn’t include a naked body…

Now that’s a quick turn-around time!

Garage sale at the louvre museum

Leonardo’s stamp collection, super-sized.

There used to be a restaurant in Baltimore named Hussner’s that had so much wall art that there was barely any space between the frames. This reminded me of that right off.

At the ‘Starving Artist Exhibition’ of 1775 you could get some great artwork for less than fifty quid!

One man’s junk can be another’s treasure

All that, all the time.

“The envelope, please.

And the award for most spectacular detail in a comic strip goes to…Steve Melcher!"

I don’t even know where to look.

In the late 1700’s, Zoffany staged the first Art Immersion Exhibit. It was such a huge flop it was 200 years before the idea was tried again.

“Mein freund… you know that you could have just bought Herr Melcher’s book, nein?”

And…Everything Everywhere All at Once……won it all!

Yard sale at Buckingham Palace.

The single biggest art forgery ever all in a single painting. The Louvre will never live down their purchase and authentication of it!

“The wall is red. This room could use some art to fill in the gaps.”

Why is it only the nudes people are looking at?

“Um Henry, that’s a statue you’re talking to.”

Someone should have installed a Prozac lick in the artists studio!

Well played!

The Tribuna of the Uffizi: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:Uffizi Tribuna (Zoffany)" site=commons.wikimedia.org 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, Yahoo, DuckDuckGo, Ecosia, and Yandex search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found and once there find the text string Google, and click its link for info and links that point to more info about this painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #3095 (March 12, 2023) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger, if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there pointing to info about this artist I used to point to here. So far, 3 works by this artist have been used here, the August 29, 2012, strip bring the prior. GoComics has deactivated the hyperlinks and removed the new lines in my comment there; but, perhaps the text remains informative.

I want to hear from Pauly Shore. 2 actors from Encino Man won Oscars.

busy night at the local porn shop, men only.maybe that’s the point.wives don’t compare to the models.

“Okay, Smart Guys. Let’s See If You Can Find Waldo When He’s NAKED!”

“Sure, the shutdown of the Vatican after the mass arrest of abusive priests was a huge scandal, but the police auction was amazing!”

“To prove you aren’t a robot, click on every picture that contains a naked person.”

“I swear, I only come here for the weekly Literary Salon!”

“Well…..look at that. Another Renaissance masterpiece. You can never have too many of those.”

Worst Baby Shower Ever

Tucker Carlson releases unedited, photographic proof that January 6 was a “peaceful gathering of sophisticated aesthetes.”

“Check out what’s in this box – ‘Frampton Comes Alive’ on vinyl, not a scratch on it! Now THAT is priceless! Can you believe I only paid $750 for this whole locker?”

Storage Wars: Firenze

Most comics are produced weeks in advance. I wonder if he had a painting for every film nominated and the syndicate just printed the winner from last night?

I’m here to throw food at the paintings in support of climate change. Am I too early?