Phoebe and Her Unicorn by Dana Simpson for June 18, 2023

Fairy tales are more than true, not because they tell us that dragons are real, but because they tell us that they can be beaten.

Cows also give milk. Your response, Marigold?

Cow: That’s my secret, Marigold. I’m always angry. …wait no

Wrong kind of helmet. She needs a spacesuit helmet.

Obviously, the cow learned to fly from all the pigs who figured it out.

Artemis “jumped” over the moon. Not “UNICORN”,… “NASA!”

Wait until the Moon is lower.

But all it takes for a unicorn to get to space is to inflate their ego with compliments (as seen in October 2022, in the GC archive).

Mooston, we have a problem!

Ah, You have to get a little dog that laughs, and a Running Dish with a spoon, then you’ll be all set!

The secret is perspective/camera angle.

“Second star to the right, and straight on ‘till morning!”

Actually, it’s often true, just not factual.

So there wasn’t a man from Nantucket?

According to a “silly” song written by Bilbo Baggins, the secret is that the Moon was just then down on the ground outside an inn which brewed really high-quality beer. The Man in the Moon had visited the inn and got sozzled on the good stuff. So the cow didn’t need to jump nearly as high back then. — as revealed by J.R.R. Tolkien in The Fellowship of the Ring

Another great anticlimactic hop.

https://www.gocomics.com/phoebe-and-her-unicorn/2013/05/19

This put me in mind of an arc from several years ago. Does anyone else remember a storyline where all the unicorns jumped to reach outer space? I seem to recall they wished to stab the pretty twinkling stars with their horns for being sparkly?

How now, jumping unicorn. Why so sad

Hey diddle diddle,

The cat and the fiddle,

The unicorn jumped over the moon…

Phoebe’s right. It doesn’t work. The poetic meter is messed up.

Ah, the return of the Great Anticlimactic Hop.

Marigold phone home

Blasphemy, Phoebe! Vitruvius the Wizard would like to have a word with you!

WHAT IS YOUR SECRET, COW?! This is definitely in my top ten best one-liners list for PaHU.

She could have someone bend down with their butt showing….

https://ibb.co/D8fBND8

You want to know the secret?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hWKv9QS2tJA

Very weird, on the print version in our newspaper, Phoebe’s comment was “Nice heirnet.”

The secret is achieving a velocity of 11.2 km/s (over 25,000 mph) to escape Earth’s gravity. Then you need to approach that sweet spot in Lunar orbit that you circle around back toward Earth instead of being flung out into space or falling onto the moon itself.

What the cow didn’t seem to factor in was re-entry and landing.