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Are you wondering how that conversation went the other day when Hoogie called her husband, Rover, to tell him that an honest-to-goodness bear was bringing home a rambunctious toddler with soul-sucking eyes? About as well as you might expect. Take a look:
H: âHi, honey, itâs me, Hoogie!â
R: âOh, goodness, Iâm so glad to hear that you are okay. I was so worried about the forest fire that destroyed 120,000 acres and killed 17 people. That sure must have kept you busy.â
H: âFire? Oh, Iâd forgotten about that. There has been so much happening around here that Iâve been too busy to deal with the fire .â
R: âThe biggest fire in the past 15 years? What could be so important that you could forget about a fire that big?â
H: âWell, Dear, I happened to meet the nicest, talking bear andâŠâ
R: âTalking bear? Iâve told you before not to pick any of those funny shaped mushrooms. Youâve had some really bad trips in the past that have lasted for days.â
H: âNo, itâs nothing like that and I only eat those magic âshrooms when things get boring around here. You see, when the fires started, a very sweet bear showed up carrying a darling little boy. And just like our little Boog, he wears a shirt with his name on it, a sign that he is meant to live with us!â
R: âBut what about his parents? Surely they must be searching for their missing son.â
H: âNow you sound like the Authorities who tried to take little Jones away from Bear and me. Jones calls us âMamaâ and âDadaâ. How darling is that?â
R: âAuthorities? Like Child Protective Services, that kind of authorities?â
H: âGosh, no, Rover. The Authorities! The kind that try to take little kids away from loving couples like Bear and me that could raise kids much better than their parents ever could.â
R: âI thought that you and I were a loving couple.â
H: âWe are, silly, but we have room to love even more. And Bear could not only take care of Jones but help you watch over Aubee and Boog.â
R: âUm, Hoogie, have you forgotten that Boog is now19 and has been away at university for the past two years? And I think I can handle a seven year-old girl with my eyes closed.â
H: âLittle Boog is away at college? I guess that explains why he never shows up at dinner. Maybe it is time for him to stop wearing shirts with his name on it.â
R: âYou keep talking about âJonesâ. Have you heard that the bodies of a young couple named Jones were recently found, mauled by a bear. And their young son is missing.â
H. (to herself): âI told him to just scare them a bit! (to Rover) âWhat an odd coincidence. Our Jones, though, knows that I am his true Mama and bear his true Dada. Iâve sent the two over and you should see them shortly. Make sure that there is enough food in the fridge for them and stop by Costco and pick up a couple of cases of Charmin? I think Bear is through with taking a #2 in the woods and it could get kind of messy if you donât.
R: âOkay, Hoogie. But you need to bring me some âshooms from your stash because something tells me I am going to need a lot and real soon.â
Gweedo -it's legal here- Murray over 1 year ago
Izzat the Dukes of Hazzard git up ân go theme I hear playing ? LOL !
sergioandrade Premium Member over 1 year ago
âJust a good old boys, never meaninâ no harmâŠâ
Dirty Dragon over 1 year ago
Any chance Uncle Bruno is protecting Jonesâ sister in there? You know how protective bears are with their young.
iggyman over 1 year ago
Thatâs the fastest those two in quite a while, Joel even left his jug behind !
Sportymonk over 1 year ago
Was thinking yesterday the voices we heard were the boyâs parents.
oakie817 over 1 year ago
finally some sense here
Jogger2 over 1 year ago
Did I miss something? Why were Joel and Rufus in a bearâs cave?
[Unnamed Reader - 14b4ce] over 1 year ago
Called it.The bear didnât mind the company, but Joel&Rufus ate all the Cheetos.
eced52 over 1 year ago
And the winner is the person who said Joel and Rufus.
Jogger2 over 1 year ago
âAgainâ? Rufus and Joel encountered this Uncle Bruno before?
Gent over 1 year ago
Well you had to comes empty handed dint cha. Shoulda gots a picanic basket.
Stat_man99 over 1 year ago
Finally, we got Rufus and Joel out of the cave from 3 month ago!!!
I Go Pogo over 1 year ago
I went back and looked. Rufus & Joel moved into the cave on August 2, 2023.
Time flies when youâre having fun.
Old Time Tales over 1 year ago
Iâm giving up actually reading the balloons. From now on lâm just looking at the pictures.
Rufus and Joel could both use a new pair of shoes.
BlitzMcD over 1 year ago
Thereâs lundh, Uncle Bruno! Youâll be full and youâll make some folks happy.
Uncle $crooge over 1 year ago
Are you wondering how that conversation went the other day when Hoogie called her husband, Rover, to tell him that an honest-to-goodness bear was bringing home a rambunctious toddler with soul-sucking eyes? About as well as you might expect. Take a look:
H: âHi, honey, itâs me, Hoogie!â
R: âOh, goodness, Iâm so glad to hear that you are okay. I was so worried about the forest fire that destroyed 120,000 acres and killed 17 people. That sure must have kept you busy.â
H: âFire? Oh, Iâd forgotten about that. There has been so much happening around here that Iâve been too busy to deal with the fire .â
R: âThe biggest fire in the past 15 years? What could be so important that you could forget about a fire that big?â
H: âWell, Dear, I happened to meet the nicest, talking bear andâŠâ
R: âTalking bear? Iâve told you before not to pick any of those funny shaped mushrooms. Youâve had some really bad trips in the past that have lasted for days.â
H: âNo, itâs nothing like that and I only eat those magic âshrooms when things get boring around here. You see, when the fires started, a very sweet bear showed up carrying a darling little boy. And just like our little Boog, he wears a shirt with his name on it, a sign that he is meant to live with us!â
R: âBut what about his parents? Surely they must be searching for their missing son.â
H: âNow you sound like the Authorities who tried to take little Jones away from Bear and me. Jones calls us âMamaâ and âDadaâ. How darling is that?â
R: âAuthorities? Like Child Protective Services, that kind of authorities?â
H: âGosh, no, Rover. The Authorities! The kind that try to take little kids away from loving couples like Bear and me that could raise kids much better than their parents ever could.â
R: âI thought that you and I were a loving couple.â
H: âWe are, silly, but we have room to love even more. And Bear could not only take care of Jones but help you watch over Aubee and Boog.â
Uncle $crooge over 1 year ago
R: âUm, Hoogie, have you forgotten that Boog is now19 and has been away at university for the past two years? And I think I can handle a seven year-old girl with my eyes closed.â
H: âLittle Boog is away at college? I guess that explains why he never shows up at dinner. Maybe it is time for him to stop wearing shirts with his name on it.â
R: âYou keep talking about âJonesâ. Have you heard that the bodies of a young couple named Jones were recently found, mauled by a bear. And their young son is missing.â
H. (to herself): âI told him to just scare them a bit! (to Rover) âWhat an odd coincidence. Our Jones, though, knows that I am his true Mama and bear his true Dada. Iâve sent the two over and you should see them shortly. Make sure that there is enough food in the fridge for them and stop by Costco and pick up a couple of cases of Charmin? I think Bear is through with taking a #2 in the woods and it could get kind of messy if you donât.
R: âOkay, Hoogie. But you need to bring me some âshooms from your stash because something tells me I am going to need a lot and real soon.â