Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for February 29, 2024

Where I live now, I was driving a car w/o GPS. I had just moved here and I guess I appeared lost. I pulled over and the car behind me asked if I was lost. I asked the exact same question! And at home I get drivers ask me to this day as they drive by my house

You can’t get there from here.

“You can check out any time you like…”

The foods probably steenks there too eh.

I wonder if they are the number 6 to ask for a map? (A little Patrick Macgoohan in the ’60’s series “The Prisoner” humour there)……

IBM moved out altogether from Broome County at the end of 2023. A sad ending for a once proud company.

I got an email the other day telling me how to read maps backwards.

Turns out it was just spam.

I was really scared when I got lost climbing some mountains recently, but I found a map, a topographical map…

It was a relief map.

I’ve been searching in this map for the past hour…

And I can’t seem to find country music.

What do you call a reptile with a map?

A navi-gator

Why couldn’t the man locate the bazaar on the map?

Because he forgot to market.

Is a place that stores maps called…

a wherehouse?

Did you hear about the book of maps that just didn’t care?

The Atlas Shrugged.

Sounds like their roads are rubbish.

All roads lead to the gift shop.

Sorry, you are on the loop road with no exits.

What happens when visitors come to a city designed by Id-iots…

We had to put baby locks on our lower cabinets to keep the cats out. Somehow one of them found a way around them.

The best part of town? the very center, that way every direction you go…you are leaving.

Better buy two!

All roads lead to Id. Everyone knows that.

There’s a furniture store here that sells clearance items and is aptly named “The Dump”.

A lifetime ago, I got off I-10 in a town in New Mexico. I couldn’t get back on at that exit. I had to drive all the way through town before I could get back on the interstate.

A little bit of Id popped through into our universe.

You’ll never get out!

IKEA designed

You can tell this is a cartoon and not based on fact. Men don’t ask for directions OR maps.

Just like Route 800 in Night Vale.

Lookin’ for the next dump.

I used to live in Venice, CA near the beach (we call it Venice Beach, right). On the weekend, there is pretty much NO PARKING available in Venice Beach. There is a one-way traffic system insidiously designed to route “parking losers” into Marina del Rey. :)

There is one way in and out of the bank parking lot. I was working the drive-through when a woman who was trying to leave circled the building three times looking for the exit, which could be reached by going right instead of left. On her third pass, she stopped at the tube and shouted to me, “How do I get out?” I told her that it was the same way she had come in. She yelled back, " No, it’s not!" before she went around one more time and finally pulled out.

Ah, so they are in Illinois …

Wait for the next Hun invasion, then hitch a ride out with them.

and the Fink made them all toll roads

Sounds like Washington D.C. You’ll never find your way to anything, even if you can see it, unless you were born and raised there. Maybe not then.