The Lockhorns by Bunny Hoest and John Reiner for May 24, 2024

Roll ⅠD20 for a perception check!

I feel like that when I have to log in to some websites. Email, password, verification text, captcha, main menu, second menu, drop-down menu, link, enter name and ID number, click “view account,” select option. Why was I going here?

That’s happened to me!! I forget why I called, and what I was looking for!!!!

Next, Leroy—either you’ll talk to a mass of machines, or to someone from India or the Philippines with an accent so thick, you’ll need an interpreter!

Been there done that.

By jove, I believe Leroy’s caught on…

LOL!

And in the meantime, they’ve used up your allocation of cell phone minutes, just listening to their never-ending list of menu options.

If my call to them really was important they’d have a person answer it. I also wonder how everyone’s options have recently changed so I must listen carefully to the list.

Even worse is every company or government agency that starts out its message: “Our menu options have changed” or the ones that use that garbage voice recognition tech that doesn’t work!

More aggravating than the myriad of options is the inordinate amount of time you have to wait on the phone after you choose one.

You called your number to retrieve a voice mail. BTW you forgot to record the time and date. :)

In a way I feel bad for the customer service reps.

By the time you wade through the VRU that has sh*t in its ears you are howling mad, & it takes some effort to not take it out on the rep when you finally connect!

Which, according to the cynics, is the very reason for all those options. And, then’ there is the “hold” music, with the “please stay on line, your call is very imprtant to us” typer announcements thrown in.

Just as they had hoped, another sadisfied customer [spelling error intended].

When you call in and you know you need to talk to someone, but they make you listen to all this prerecorded news, hoping you’ll hang up before a paid employee has to talk to you. “Try doing this on our website instead” and “Did you know you can get prescriptions through the mail?” and “Hey, while we have you as a captive audience, have you thought about purchasing an extended warranty?”

I just spent 2 hours calling two different hospitals for medical records. The first call, which involved about 8 calls, was difficult; the second one was an easy 6 minutes. Names and numbers and times plus date written down, just in case.

Complicated phone calls annoy me, although I am as nice as I can be to the people, once I get to them. Before that, as I am listening to all the options that don’t apply to the reason I am calling, I will literally hold up fingers (for myself) for the number I need to press since I will generally listen to all the choices.

• how about when there’s no category for the problem you got

So true Leroy

Or it leaves you on hold for so long you forget why (or who) you called!